Peer Reviewed
- Edition: The Honest Whore, Part 2
The Honest Whore, Part 2 (Modern)
- Introduction
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- The Honest Whore, Parts 1 and 2: Acknowledgements
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- The Honest Whore, Parts 1 and 2: Abbreviations
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- The Honest Whore, Parts 1 and 2: Introduction
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- The Honest Whore, Parts 1 and 2: Analysis of the Plays
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- The Honest Whore, Parts 1 and 2: The Plays in Performance
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- The Honest Whore, Parts 1 and 2: Textual Introduction
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- The Honest Whore, Parts 1 and 2: Appendices
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- Texts of this edition
- Facsimiles
1612.1[4.1]
How am I suited, Front? Am I not gallant, ha?
Yes, sir, you are suited well.
Exceeding, passing well, and to the time.
The tailor has played his part with you.
And I have played a gentleman始s part with my 1619tailor, for I owe him for the making of it.
And why did you so, sir?
To keep the fashion. It始s your only fashion now 1622of your best rank of gallants to make their tailors wait 1623for their money. Neither were it wisdom, indeed, to pay 1624them upon the first edition of a new suit, for commonly 1625the suit is owing for when the linings are worn out, and 1626there始s no reason then that the tailor should be paid 1627before the mercer.
Is this the suit the knight bestowed upon you?
This is the suit, and I need not shame to wear it, 1630for better men than I would be glad to have suits 1631bestowed on them. It始s a generous fellow, but – pox on him – we 1632whose pericranions are the very limbecks and stillatories 1633of good wit, and fly high, must drive liquor out of stale 1634gaping oysters. Shallow knight, poor squire Tinacceo! I始ll 1635make a wild Cathaian of forty such. Hang him, he始s an ass – 1636he始s always sober.
This is your fault, to wound your friends still.
No, faith, Front; Lodovico is a noble Slavonian. It始s 1639more rare to see him in a woman始s company than for a 1640Spaniard to go into England and to challenge the English 1641fencers there. [Knocking within.] One knocks – see.
4.1.11.1[Exit Bellafront.]
4.1.12[Sings.] La, fa, sol, la, fa, la. – 1642Rustle in silks and satins! There始s music in this, and a 1643taffeta petticoat; it makes both fly high. Catso!
Mattheo, 始tis my father!
Ha? Father? It始s no matter; he finds no tattered 1648prodigals here.
[To the Men] Is not the door good enough to hold your blue 1650coats? Away, knaves!
4.1.15.1[Exeunt four Men.]
4.1.16Wear not your clothes threadbare 1651at knees for me; beg heaven始s blessing, not mine. [To Mattheo] O, cry 1652your worship mercy, sir! Was somewhat bold to talk to 1653this gentlewoman your wife here.
[Baring his head] A poor gentlewoman, sir.
Stand not, sir, bare to me. I ha始 read oft
If it offend you, sir, 始tis for my pleasure.
Your pleasure be始t, sir. [To both] Umh, is this your palace?
Yes, and our kingdom, for 始tis our content.
It始s a very poor kingdom, then. What, are all your 1662subjects gone a-sheepshearing? Not a maid? Not a man? 1663Not so much as a cat? You keep a good house, belike, just 1664like one of your profession: every room with bare walls, 1665and a half-headed bed to vault upon, as all your 1666bawdy-houses are. Pray, who are your upholsters? O, the spiders, 1667I see; they bestow hangings upon you.
Bawdy-house? Zounds, sir –
O sweet Mattheo, peace.
4.1.26.1[To Orlando, kneeling]
Upon my knees
Pox on him! Kneel to a dog?
1676Bellafront
She that始s a whore
No acquaintance with it? What maintains thee, 1681then? How dost live, then? Has thy husband any lands, any 1682rents coming in, any stock going, any ploughs jogging, 1683any ships sailing? Hast thou any wares to turn, so much 1684as to get a single penny by?
4.1.37Yes, thou hast ware to sell;
Do you hear, sir? –
So, sir, I do hear, sir, more of you than you dream I do.
You fly a little too high, sir.
Why, sir, too high?
I ha始 suffered your tongue, like a barred cater-trey, to 1691run all this while, and ha始 not stopped it.
Well, sir, you talk like a gamester.
If you come to bark at her because she始s a poor 1694rogue, look you, here始s a fine path, sir, and there, there, the 1695door.
Mattheo!
Your blue-coats stay for you, sir. 1698I love a good honest roaring boy, and so –
That始s the devil.
Sir, sir, I始ll ha始 no Joves in my house to thunder 1701avaunt. She shall live and be maintained when you, like a 1702keg of musty sturgeon, shall stink. Where? In your coffin. 1703How? Be a musty fellow, and lousy.
I know she shall be maintained, but how? She始s like a 1705quean, thou like a knave. She like a whore, thou like a 1706thief.
Thief? Zounds! Thief?
Good, dearest Mat! – Father!
Pox on you both! I始ll not be braved. New satin 1710scorns to be put down with bare bawdy velvet. Thief!
Ay, thief. Thou始rt a murderer, a cheater, a 1712whoremonger, a pot-hunter, a borrower, a beggar –
Dear father –
An old ass, a dog, a churl, a chuff, an usurer, a 1715villain, a moth, a mangy mule with an old velvet 1716foot-cloth on his back, sir.
O me!
Varlet, for this I始ll hang thee.
Ha, ha! Alas!
Thou keepst a man of mine here, under my nose.
Under thy beard.
As arrant a smell-smock, for an old mutton-monger, 1723as thyself.
No, as yourself.
As arrant a purse-taker as ever cried ‘Stand!始, yet a 1726good fellow, I confess, and valiant. But he始ll bring thee to th始1727gallows; you both have robbed of late two poor country 1728pedlars.
How始s this? How始s this? Dost thou fly high? Rob 1730pedlars? – Bear witness, Front! – Rob pedlars? My man and I a 1731thief?
[To Orlando] O sir, no more!
Ay, knave, two pedlars. Hue and cry is up, warrants 1734are out, and I shall see thee climb a ladder.
And come down again as well as a bricklayer or 1736a tiler. [Aside] How the vengeance knows he this? [Aloud] If I be 1737hanged, I始ll tell the people I married old Frescobaldo始s daughter. 1738I始ll frisco you, and your old carcass.
Tell what thou canst. If I stay here longer I shall be 1740hanged too, for being in thy company. [To both] Therefore, as I found 1741you I leave you –
[Aside to Bellafront] Kneel, and get money of him.
A knave and a quean, a thief and a strumpet, a 1744couple of beggars, a brace of baggages.
[Aside to Bellafront] Hang upon him. [Aloud] Ay, ay, sir, fare you well. We are so. [Aside to Bellafront] 1746Follow close. [Aloud] We are beggars – [Aside] in satin. [Aside to Bellafront] To him!
[To Orlando, hanging upon him]
4.1.73.1Is this your comfort, when so many years
1749Orlando
Freeze still, starve still!
Yes, so I shall. I must. I must and will.
1761Orlando
Lowest ebb? What ebb?
So poor that, though to tell it be my shame,
It始s not seen by your cheeks.
[Aside] I think she has read an homily to tickle to the old
1767rogue.
Want bread? There始s satin; bake that.
始Sblood, make pasties of my clothes?
A fair new cloak, stew that; an excellent gilt 1771rapier –
Will you eat that, sir?
I could feast ten good fellows with those hangers.
The pox, you shall!
[To Bellafront] I shall not, till thou begst, think thou art poor;
4.1.101.1Exit.
This is your father, your damned – confusion 1782light upon all the generation of you! He can come bragging 1783hither with four white herrings at始s tail in blue 1784coats without roes in their bellies, but I may starve ere he 1785give me so much as a cob.
What tell you me of this? Alas!
Go, trot after your dad. Do you capitulate; I始ll 1788pawn not for you, I始ll not steal to be hanged for such an 1789hypocritical, close, common harlot. Away, you dog! 1790Brave, i始faith! Ud始s foot, give me some meat.
Yes, sir.
4.1.105.1Exit.
Goodman Slave, my man, too, is galloped to the 1793devil o始the tother side. Pacheco, I始ll ‘checo始 you. – Is this your 1794dad始s day? England, they say, is the only hell for horses, and 1795only paradise for women. Pray, get you to that paradise, 1796because you始re called an Honest Whore. There, they live none 1797but honest whores – with a pox. Marry, here in our city, all 1798your sex are but foot-cloth nags; the master no sooner lights 1799but the man leaps into the saddle.
Will you sit down, I pray, sir?
[Sits down on a stool and eats]
4.1.108.1I could tear, by th始Lord, his flesh, and eat his 1803midriff in salt, as I eat this. [To her] Must I choke? – My 1804father Frescobaldo! I shall make a pitiful hog-louse of you, 1805Orlando, if you fall once into my fingers. – Here始s the 1806savourest meat; I ha始 got a stomach with chafing. What rogue 1807should tell him of those two pedlars? A plague choke him, 1808and gnaw him to the bare bones! Come, fill.
4.1.108.2[She fills up his glass.]
Thou sweatst with very anger. Good sweet, vex not; 1810始Las, 始tis no fault of mine.
Where didst buy this mutton? I never felt better 1812ribs.
A neighbour sent it me.
Ha, neighbour? Faugh! My mouth stinks. You whore, 1816do you beg victuals for me? Is this satin doublet to be 1817bombasted with broken meat?
4.1.112.1[He] takes up the stool.
What will you do, sir?
Beat out the brains of a beggarly –
Beat out an ass始s head of your own. – Away, mistress!
4.1.115.1Exit Bellafront.
4.1.1161821Zounds, do but touch one hair of her, and I始ll so quilt 1822your cap with old iron that your coxcomb shall ache the 1823worse these seven years for始t. Does she look like a roasted 1824rabbit, that you must have the head for the brains?
Ha, ha! Go out of my doors, you rogue. Away, 1826four marks; trudge.
Four marks? No, sir! My twenty pound that you ha始 1828made fly high, and I am gone.
Must I be fed with chippings? You始re best get a 1830clapdish, and say you始re proctor to some spital-house. – Where 1831hast thou been, Pacheco? Come hither, my little 1832turkey-cock.
I cannot abide, sir, to see a woman wronged, not I.
Sirrah, here was my father-in-law today.
Pish, then you始re full of crowns.
Hang him! He would ha始 thrust crowns upon me to 1837have fallen in again, but I scorn cast clothes, or any man始s 1838gold.
[Aside] But mine. [Aloud] How did he brook that, sir?
O, swore like a dozen of drunken tinkers. At last, 1841growing foul in words, he and four of his men drew 1842upon me, sir.
In your house? Would I had been by.
I made no more ado, but fell to my old lock, and 1845so thrashed my blue-coats, and old crab-tree-face my 1846father-in-law; and then walked like a lion in my grate.
O noble master!
Sirrah, he could tell me of the robbing the two 1849pedlars, and that warrants are out for us both.
Good sir, I like not those crackers.
Crackhalter, wu始t set thy foot to mine?
How, sir? At drinking?
We始ll pull that old crow my father, rob thy 1854master. I know the house, thou the servants. The purchase is 1855rich; the plot to get it easy; the dog will not part from a 1856bone.
Pluck始t out of his throat, then. I始ll snarl for one, if 1858this [Indicating his sword] can bite.
Say no more, say no more, old cole. Meet me anon at 1860the sign of the Shipwreck.
Yes, sir.
And dost hear, man? The Shipwreck.
4.1.137.1Exit.
Thou始rt at the shipwreck now, and like a swimmer
4.1.145.1Exit.
It is my fate to be bewitchèd by those eyes.
Fate? Your folly.
Your hand; I始ll offer you fair play. When first
1883Bellafront
You did.
1884Hippolito
I始ll try
1891Bellafront
If you can,
1893Hippolito
The alarm始s struck up; I始m your man.
A woman gives defiance.
1895Hippolito
Sit.
1896Bellafront
Begin.
You men that are to fight in the same war
1902Bellafront
No doubt you始re heard. Proceed.
To be a harlot, that you stand upon,
So should a husband be dishonourèd.
Dishonoured? Not a whit. To fall to one,
1938Bellafront
Faith, should you take
1941Hippolito
Say, have I won?
1943Bellafront
The battle始s but half done.
If you can win the day, 1947the glory始s yours.
To prove a woman should not be a whore,
You should not feed so, but with me alone.
If I drink poison by stealth, is始t not all one?
If all the threads of harlots始 lives are spun
1995Bellafront
If all the threads
It is a common rule, and 始tis most true,
Why dote you on that which you did once detest?
I!
2045Bellafront
You? Nay, then, as cowards do in fight,
4.1.307.1Exit.
Fly to earth始s fixèd centre, to the caves
4.1.311.1Exit.