0.0080.008Printed by V. S. for Iohn Hodgets, and are to
11ACTVS PRIMVS. SCAENA PRIMA. 22Enter at one doore a Funerall, a Coronet lying on the Hearse, Scut- 33 chins and Garlands hanging on the sides, attended by Gasparo 44 Trebatzi, Duke of Millan, Castruchio, Sinezi. Pioratto 5 Fluello, 5and others at an other doore. Enter Hipolito in discon- 66 tented apparance: Matheo a Gentleman his friend, labouring 99BEhold, yon Commet
shewes his head againe;
1010Twice hath he thus at cro
sse-turnes throwne on vs
1111Prodigious lookes: Twice hath he troubled
1212The waters of our eyes. See, hee's turnde wilde;
1414All On afore there ho.
1515Duke Kin
smen and
friends, take
from your manly
sides
1616Your weapons to keepe backe the de
sprate boy
1717From doing violence to the innocent dead.
1818Hipolito I pry thee deere
Matheo.
1919Matheo Come, y'are mad.
2020Hip: I do are
st thee murderer:
set downe.
2121Villaines
set downe that
sorrow, tis all mine.
2222Duke I do be
seech you all, for my bloods
sake
2323Send hence your milder
spirits, and let wrath
2424Ioine in confederacie with your weapons points;
2525If he proceede to vexe vs, let your
swordes
2626Seeke out his bowells: funerall griefe loathes words.
2828Hip. Set downe the body.
3030Y'are wrong
: i'th open
streete
? you
see
shees dead.
3131Hip: I know
shee is not dead.
3232Duke Franticke yong man,
3333Wilt thou beleeve the
se gentlemen? pray
speake:
A 2
The Honest Whore:
3434Thou doo
st abu
se my childe, and mock
st the teares
3535That heere are
shed for her: If to behold
3636Tho
se ro
ses withered, that
set out her cheekes:
3737That paire of
starres that gave her body light,
3838Darkned and dim for ever
: All tho
se rivers
3939That fed her veines with warme and crim
son
streames,
4040Frozen and dried vp: If the
se be
signes of death,
4141Then is
she dead. Thou vnreligious youth,
4242Art not a
shamde to emptie all the
se eyes
4343Of funerall teares, (a debt due to the dead,)
4444As mirth is to the living: Sham'
st thou not
4545To have them
stare on thee? harke, thou art cur
st 4646Even to thy face, by tho
se that
scarce can
speake.
4848Duke What would
st thou have? is
she not dead
? 4949Hip. Oh, you ha killd her by your crueltie.
5050Duke Admit I had, thou kill
st her now againe;
5151And art more
savage then a barbarous Moore.
5252Hip. Let me but ki
sse her pale and bloodle
sse lip.
5353Duke O
fie,
fie,
fie.
5454Hip. Or if not touch her, let me looke on her.
5555Math. As you regard your honour.
5757Math. Or if you lov'de hir living,
spare her now.
5858Duke I, well done
sir, you play the gentleman:
5959Steale hence
: tis nobly done
: away
: Ile ioyne
6060My force to yours, to
stop this violent torment:
6161Pa
sse on.
Exeunt with funerall. 6262Hip. Matheo, thou doo
st wound me more.
6363Math. I give you phi
sicke noble
friend, not wounds,
6464Duke Oh well
said, well done, a true gentleman:
6565Alacke, I know the
sea of lovers rage
6666Comes ru
shing with
so
strong a tide
: it beates
6767And beares downe all re
spe
cts of life, of honour,
6868Of
friends, of foes, forget her gallant youth.
7070Duke Na, na, be but patient
: 7171For why deaths hand hath
sued a
stri
ct divor
se
Twixt
The Honest Whore.
7272Twixt her and thee: whats beautie but a coar
se?
7373What but faire
sand-du
st are earths pure
st formes:
7474Queenes bodies are but trunckes to put in wormes.
7575Mathew Speake no more
sentences, my good lord, but
slip
7676hence; you
see they are but
fits, ile rule him I warrant ye. I,
so,
7777treade gingerly, your Grace is heere
somewhat too long alrea
- 7878dy. Sbloud the jea
st were now, if having tane
some knockes
7979o'th pate already, he
should get loo
se againe, and like a madde
8080Oxe, to
sse my new blacke cloakes into the kennell. I mu
st hu
- 8181mour his lord
ship
: my lord
Hipolito, is it in your
stomacke to
8383Hipolito Where is the body?
8484Matheo The body, as the Duke
spake very wi
sely, is gone
8686Hipolito I cannot re
st, ile meete it at next turne,
8787Ile
see how my love lookes,
Mathaeo holds him ins armes 8888Mathaeo How your love lookes
? wor
se than a
scarre-crowe,
8989wra
stle not with me
: the great felow gives the fall for a duckat.
9090Hipolito I
shall forget my
selfe.
9191Mathaeo Pray do
so, leave your
selfe behinde your
selfe, and
9292go whither you will. Sfoote, doe you long to have ba
se roags
9393that maintaine a
saint
Anthonies fire in their no
ses (by nothing
9494but two peny Ale) make ballads of you? if the Duke had but
so
9595much mettle in him, as is in a coblers awle, he would ha beene a
9696vext thing: he and his traine had blowne you vp, but that their
9797powlder haz taken the wet of cowards
: youle bleed three pot
- 9898tles of Aligant, by this light, if you follow em, and then wee
9999shall have a hole made in a wrong place, to have Surgeons roll
100100thee vp like a babie in
swadling clowts.
101101Hipolito What day is to day, M
athaeo? 102102Mathaeo Yea mary, this is an ea
sie que
stion
: why to day is,
103103let me
see, thur
seday.
Hipolito Oh, thur
seday.
104104Mathaeo Heeres a coile for a dead commoditie, sfoote wo
- 105105men when they are alive are but dead commodities, for you
106106shall have one woman lie vpon many mens hands.
107107Hipolito Shee died on monday then.
108108Mathaeo And thats the mo
st villainous day of all the weeke
109109to die in
: and
she was wel, and eate a me
sse of water-grewel on
A 3 monday
The Honest Whore.
111111Hipolito I, it cannot be,
112112Such a bright taper
should burne out
so
soone.
113113Mathaeo O yes my Lord,
so
soone: why I ha knowne them,
114114that at dinner have bin a
swell, and had
so much health, that they
115115were glad to pledge it, yet before three a clocke have bin found
117117Hipolito On thur
seday buried! and on monday died,
118118Quicke ha
ste birlady:
sure her winding
sheete
119119Was laide out fore her bodie, and the wormes
120120That now mu
st fea
st with her, were even be
spoke,
121121And
solemnely invited like
strange gue
sts.
122122Mathaeo Strange feeders they are indeede my lord, and like
123123your jea
ster or yong Courtier, will enter vpon any mans tren
- 125125Hipolito Cur
st be that day for ever that robd her
126126Of breath, and me of bli
sse, hencefoorth let it
stand
127127Within the Wizardes booke (the kalendar)
128128Markt with a marginall
finger, to be cho
sen
129129By theeves, by villaines, and blacke murderers,
130130As the be
st day for them to labour in.
131131If hencefoorth this adulterous bawdy world
132132Be got with childe with trea
son,
sacrilege,
133133Athei
sme, rapes, treacherous
friend
ship, periurie,
134134Slaunder, (the beggars
sinne) lies, (
sinne of fooles)
135135Or anie other damnd impieties,
136136On
Monday let em be delivered
: 137137I
sweare to thee Math
aeo, by my
soule.
138138Heereafter weekely on that day ile glew
139139Mine eie-lids downe, becau
se they
shall not gaze
140140On any female cheeke. And being lockt vp
141141In my clo
se chamber, there ile meditate
142142On nothing but my
Infaelices end,
143143Or on a dead mans
scull drawe out mine owne.
144144Mathaeo Youle doe all the
se good workes now every mon
- 145145day, becau
se it is
so bad
: but I hope vppon tue
sday morning I
146146shall take you with a wench.
147147Hipolito If ever whil
st fraile bloud through my veins runne,
On
The Honest Whore.
148148On womans beames I throw a
ffe
ction,
149149Save her thats dead: or that I loo
sely
flie
150150To'th
shoare of any other wafting eie,
151151Let me not pro
sper heaven. I will be true,
152152Even to her du
st and a
shes
: could her tombe
153153Stand whil
st I livde
so long, that it might rot,
154154That
should fall downe, but
she be ne're forgot.
155155Mathaeo If you have this
strange mon
ster, Hone
stie, in
156156your belly, why
so Iig-makers and chroniclers
shall picke
som
- 157157thing out of you
: but and I
smell not you and a bawdy hou
se
158158out within the
se tenne daies, let my no
se be as bigge as an En
- 159159gli
sh bag-pudding
: Ile followe your lord
ship, though it be to
160160the place aforenamed.
Exeunt. 161161Enter Fustigo in some fantastike Sea-suite at one 162162doore, a Porter meets him at another. 163163Fust. How now porter, will
she come?
164164Porter If I may tru
st a woman
sir,
she will come.
165165Fust. Theres for thy paines, godamercy, if ever I
stand in
166166neede of a wench that will come with a wet
finger, Porter, thou
167167shalt earne my mony before anie
Clarissimo in Millane; yet
so
168168god
sa mee
shees mine owne
sister body and
soule, as I am a
169169chri
stian Gentleman; farewell, ile ponder till
shee come: thou
170170ha
st bin no bawde in fetching this woman, I a
ssure thee.
171171Porter No matter if I had
sir, better men than Porters are
173173Fust. O God
sir, manie that have borne o
ffices. But Por
- 174174ter, art
sure thou went
st into a true hou
se
? 175175Porter I thinke
so, for I met with no thieves.
176176Fust. Nay but arte
sure it was my
sister
Viola.
177177Porter I am
sure by all
super
scriptions it was the partie you (ciphered.
179179Porter Nor very lowe, a midling woman.
180180Fust. Twas
she faith, twas
she, a prettie plumpe cheeke like (mine.
181181Porter At a blu
sh, a little very much like you.
182182Fust. Gods
so, I would not for a duckat
she had kickt vp hir
183183heeles, for I ha
spent an abomination this voyage, marie I
184184did it among
st sailers and gentlemen: theres a little modicum
more
The Honest Whore.
185185more porter for making thee
stay, farewell hone
st porter.
186186Porter I am in your debt
sir, God pre
serve you.
Exit. 188188Fu. Not
so neither, good porter, gods lid, yonder
she coms.
189189Si
ster
Viola, I am glad to
see you
stirring: its newes to have mee
191191Viola Yes tru
st me: I wondred who
should be
so bolde to
192192send for me, you are welcome to
Millan brother.
193193Fust. Troth
sister I heard you were married to a verie rich
194194chu
ffe, and I was very
sorie for it, that I had no better clothes,
195195and that made me
send: for you knowe wee Millaners love to
196196strut vpon Spani
sh leather. And how does all our
friends?
197197Viola Very well; you ha travelled enough now, I trowe, to
199199Fust. A pox on em; wilde oates, I ha not an oate to throw
200200at a hor
se, troth
sister I ha
sowde my oates, and reapt 200.
201201duckats if I had em, heere, mary I mu
st intreate you to lend me
202202some thirty or forty till the
ship come, by this hand ile di
scharge
203203at my day, by this hand.
204204Viola The
se are your olde oaths.
205205Fust. Why
sister, doe you thinke ile for
sweare my hand?
206206Viola Well, well, you
shall have them: put your
selfe into
207207better fa
shion, becau
se I mu
st imploy you in a
serious matter.
208208Fust. Ile
sweare like a hor
se if I like the matter.
209209Uiola You ha ca
st o
ff all your olde
swaggering humours.
210210Fust. I had not
sailde a league in that great
fish-pond (the
211211sea) but I ca
st vp my very gall.
212212Viola I am the more
sory, for I mu
st imploy a true
swagge
- 214214Fust. Nay by this yron
sister, they
shall
finde I am powlder
215215and touch-box, if they put
fire once into me.
216216Uiola Then lend me your eares.
217217Fust. Mine eares are yours deere
sister.
218218Uiola I am married to a man that haz wealth enough, and
220220Fust. A linnen Draper I was tolde
sister.
221221Viola Very true, a grave Cittizen; I want nothing that a
222222wife can wi
sh from a husband: but heeres the
spite, hee haz
not
The Honest Whore.
223223not all things belonging to a man.
224224Fust. Gods my life, hee's a verie mandrake, or el
se (God
225ble
sse
225vs) one a the
se whiblins, and thats woor
se, and then
226all the
226children that he gets lawfully of your body
sister, are
228228Vio: O you runne over me too fa
st brother, I have heard it
229229often
said, that hee who cannot be angry, is no man. I am
sure
230230my husband is a man in print, for all things el
se,
save onely in
231231this, no tempe
st can move him.
232232Fist. Slid, would he had beene at
sea with vs, hee
should ha
233233beene movde and movde agen, for Ile be
sworne la, our drun
- 234234ken
ship reelde like a Dutchman.
235235Viola No lo
sse of goods can increa
se in him a wrinckle, no
236236crabbed language make his countenance
sowre, the
stubburn
- 237237nes of no
servant
shake him, he haz no more gall in him than a
238238Dove, no more
sting than an Ant: Mu
sitian will he never bee,
239239(yet I
finde much mu
sicke in him,) but he loves no
frets, and
240is
240so
free
from anger, that many times I am ready to bite o
ff my
241241tongue, becau
se it wants that vertue which all womens tongues
242242have (to anger their husbands:) Brother, mine can by no thun
- 243243der: turne him into a
sharpenes.
244244Fust. Belike his blood
sister, is well brewd then.
245245Viola I prote
st to thee
Fustigo, I love him mo
st a
ffe
cti
- 246246onately, but I know not ---- I ha
such a tickling with
- 247247in mee ----
such a
strange longing; nay, verily I doo
249249Fustigo Then y'are with childe
sister, by all
signes and
250250tokens; nay, I am partly a Phi
sitian, and partly
something
251251el
se. I ha read
Albertus Magnus, and
Aristotles em
- 253253Viola Y'are wide ath bow hand
still brother: my longings
254254are not wanton, but wayward: I long to have my patient hus
- 255255band eate vp a whole Porcupine, to the intent, the bri
stling
256256quills may
sticke about his lippes like a
flemmi
sh mu
stacho,
257and be
257shot at me: I
shall be leaner than the new Moone, vn
- 258le
sse I
258can make him hornemad.
259259Fust: Sfoote halfe a quarter of an houre does that: make him
B Viola
The Honest Whore.
261261Viola Puh, he would count
such a cut no vnkindenes.
262262Fust. The hone
ster Cittizen he, then make him drunke and
264264Viola Fie,
fie, idle, idle, hee's no French-man, to
fret at the
265265lo
sse of a little
scalde haire. No brother, thus it
shall be, you mu
st 267267Fu. As your Mid-wife I prote
st sister, or a Barber-
surgeon.
268268Viola Repaire to the
Tortoys heere in S.
Christophers streete,
269269I will
send you mony, turne your
selfe into a brave man: in
steed
270270of the armes of your mi
stris, let your
sword and your militarie
271271scarfe hang about your necke.
272272Fust: I mu
st have a great Hor
se-mans French feather too
274274Uiola O, by any meanes, to
shew your light head, el
se your
275275hat will
sit like a coxcombe: to be briefe, you mu
st bee in all
276276points a mo
st terrible wide-mouth'd
swaggerer.
277277Fust. Nay, for
swaggering points let me alone.
278278Viola Re
sort then to our
shop, and (in my husbands pre
sence)
279279ki
sse me,
snatch rings, jewells, or any thing;
so you give it backe
281281Fust. By this hand
sister.
282282Uiola Sweare as if you came but new
from knight
- 284284Fust. Nay, Ile
sweare after 400. a yeare.
285285Uiola Swagger wor
se then a Lievetenant among
fre
sh-wa
- 286ter
286souldiers, call me your love, your yngle, your coo
sen, or
so;
288288Fust. No, no, It
shall be coo
sen, or rather cuz, thats the gulling
289289word betweene the Cittizens wives & their olde dames,
290that
290man em to the garden; to call you one a mine aunts,
sister,
291were
291as good as call you arrant whoores no, no, let me alone to
292co
sen
293293Uiola Haz heard I have a brother, but never
saw him, there
- 294294fore put on a good face.
295295Fust. The be
st in
Millan I warrant.
296296Viola Take vp wares, but pay nothing, ri
fle my bo
some, my
297297pocket, my pur
se, the boxes for mony to dice with all; but bro
- 298298ther, you mu
st give all backe agen in
secret.
Fustigo
The Honest Whore.
299299Fustigo By this welkin that heere roares? I will, or el
se
300300let me never know what a
secret is: why
sister do you thinke
301301Ile cunni-catch you, when you are my coo
sen? Gods my life,
302302then I were a
starke A
sse, if I
fret not his guts, beg me for a
304304Viola Be circum
spe
ct, and do
so then, farewell.
305305Fust. The
Tortoys sister? Ile
stay there; forty duckats.
Exit. 306306Viola Thither Ile
send: this law can none deny,
307307Women mu
st have their longings, or they die.
Exit. 308308Gasparo the Duke, Doctor Benedicke, two seruants. 309309Duke Give charge that none do enter, locke the doores;
310310And fellowes, what your eyes and eares receave,
311311Vpon your lives tru
st not the gadding aire
312312To carry the lea
st part of it: the gla
sse, the houre-gla
sse.
314314Duke. Ah, tis meere
spent.
315315But Do
ctor
Benedick, does your Art
speake truth?
316316Art
sure the
soporiferous
streame will ebbe,
317317And leave the Chri
stall banks of her white body
318318(Pure as they were at
fir
st) iu
st at the houre?
319319Doctor Iu
st at the houre my Lord.
321321Softly
sweete Do
ctor: what a coldi
sh heate
322322Spreads over all her bodie.
324324The vitall
spirits that by a
sleepie charme
325325Were bound vp fa
st, and threw an icie ru
st 326326On her exterior parts, now gin to breake:
327327Trouble her not my Lord.
328328Duke Some
stooles, you calld
329329For mu
sicke, did you not? Oh ho, it
speakes,
330330It
speakes, watch
sirs her waking, note tho
se
sands,
331331Do
ctor
sit downe: A Dukedome that
should wey mine
332332Owne downe twice, being put into one
scale:
333333And that fond de
sperate boy
Hipolito,
334334Making the weight vp,
should not (at my hands)
335335Buy her i'th tother, were her
state more light
336336Than hers, who makes a dowrie vp with almes.
B 2 Doctor
The Honest Whore.
337337Do
ctor Ile
starve her on the Appenine
338338Ere he
shall marrie her: I mu
st confe
sse,
339339Hipolito is nobly borne, a man;
340340Did not mine enemies blood boile in his veines,
341341Whom I would court to be my
sonne in law?
342342But Princes who
se high
spleenes for empery
swell,
343343Are not with ea
sie arte made paralell.
3443442 Ser. She wakes my Lord.
Duke Looke Do
ctor
Benedick.
345345I charge you on your lives maintaine for truth,
346346What ere the Do
ctor or my
selfe averre
347347For you
shall beare hes hence to
Bergaine 348348Inf. Oh God, what fearefull dreames?
351351Why
Infaelisha, how i
st now, ha,
speake?
352352Inf. I'me well, what makes this Do
ctor heere? I'me well.
353353Duke Thou wert not
so even now,
sicknes pale hand
354354Laid hold on thee even in the dead
st of fea
sting,
355355And when a cap crownde with thy lovers health
356356Had toucht thy lips, a
sencible cold dew
357357Stood on thy cheekes, as if that death had wept
358358To
see
such beautie alterd.
360360I
sate at banquet, but felt no
such change.
361361Duke Thou ha
st forgot then how a me
ssenger
362362Came wildely in with this vn
savorie newes
364364Inf. What me
ssenger? whoes dead?
365365Duke Hipolito, alacke, wring not thy hands.
366366Inf. I
saw no me
ssenger, heard no
such newes,
367367Doctor Tru
st me you did
sweete Lady.
368368Duke La you now.
2 Servants Yes indeede Madam.
369369Duke La you now, tis well God knowes.
370370Inf. You ha
slaine him, and now you'le murder mee.
371371Duke Good
Infaelishae vexe not thus thy
selfe,
372372Of this the bad report before did
strike
373373So coldly to the heart, that the
swift currents
374374Of life were all
frozen vp.
It
The Honest Whore.
376376Tis mo
st vntrue, O mo
st vnnaturall father!
377377Duke And we had much to do by Arts be
st cunning,
378378To fetch life backe againe.
379379Doctor Mo
st certaine Lady.
380380Duke Why la you now, you'le not beleeve mee,
friends,
381381Sweate we not all; had we not much to do?
3823822 Ser. Yes indeede my Lord, much.
383383Duke Death drew
such fearefull pi
ctures in thy face,
384384That were
Hipolito alive agen,
385385Ile kneele and woo the noble gentleman
386386To be thy husband: now I fore repent
387387My
sharpenes to him, and his family;
388388Nay, do not weepe for him, we all mu
st die:
389389Do
ctor, this place where
she
so oft hath
seene
390390His lively pre
sence, haunts her, does it not?
391391Doctor Doubtle
sse my Lord it does.
393393Therefore
sweete girle thou
shalt to
Bergamo.
394394Inf. Even where you will, in any place theres woe.
395395Duke A Coach is ready,
Bergamo doth
stand
396396In a mo
st whole
some aire,
sweete walkes, theres diere,
397397I, thou
shalt hunt and
send vs veni
son.
398398Which like
some gods in the
Coprian groves,
399399Thine owne faire hand
shall
strike;
sirs, you
shall teach her
400400To
stand, and how to
shoote, I,
she
shall hunt:
401401Ca
st o
ff this
sorrow. In girle, and prepare
402402This night to ride away to
Bergamo.
403403Inf. O mo
st vnhappie maid.
Exit. 405405No words that
she was buried on your lives,
406406Or that her gho
st walkes now after
shees dead;
407407Ile hang you if you name a funerall.
4084081 Ser. Ile
speake Greeke my Lord, ere I
speake that dead
- 4104102 Ser. And Ile
speake Welch, which is harder then Greek.
( Exeunt. 411411Duke Away, looke to her; Do
ctor
Benedick,
412412Did you ob
serve how her complexion altered
B 3 Vpon
The Honest Whore.
413413Vpon his name and death, O would t'were true.
415415Duke May? how? I wi
sh his death.
416416Doctor And you may have your wi
sh:
say but the word,
417417And tis a
strong Spell to rip vp his grave:
418418I have good knowledge with
Hipolito;
419419He calls me
friend, Ile creepe into his bo
some,
420420And
sting him there to death; poi
son can doo't.
421421Duke Performe it; Ile create thee halfe mine heire.
422422Doctor It
shall be done, although the fa
ct be fowle.
423423Duke Greatnes hides
sin, the guilt vpon my
soule.
Exeunt 424424Enter Castruchio, Pioratto, and Fluello. 425425Cast: Signior
Pioratto,
signior
Fluello,
shalls be merry?
shalls
427427Flu: I, any thing that may beget the childe of laughter.
428428Cast: Truth I have a pretty
sportive conceit new crept into
429429my braine, will moove excellent mirth.
430430Pio: Lets ha't, lets ha't, and where
shall the
sceane of mirth (lie?
431431Cast. At
signior
Candidoes hou
se, the patient man, nay the
432432mon
strous patient man; they
say his bloud is immoveable, that
433433he haz taken all patience
from a man, and all con
stancie
from
435435Flu. That makes
so many whoores nowadayes.
436436Cast. I, and
so many knaves too.
438438Cast. To conclude, the reporte goes, hees
so milde,
so a
ffa
- 439439ble,
so
su
ffering, that nothing indeede can moove him: now do
440440but thinke what
sport it will be to make this fellow (the mirror
441441of patience) as angry, as vext, and as madde as an Engli
sh cuc
- 443443Flu. O, twere admirable mirth, that
: but how wilt be done
445445Cast. Let me alone, I have a tricke, a conceit, a thing, a de
- 446446vice will
sting him yfaith, if he have but a thimblefull of blood
447447ins belly, or a
spleene not
so bigge as a taverne token.
448448Pio. Thou
stirre him? thou moove him? thou anger him?
449449alas, I know his approoved temper: thou vex him? why hee
450450haz a patieuce above mans iniuries
: thou maie
st sooner rai
se a
spleane
The Honest Whore.
451451spleene in an Angell, than rough humour in him
: why ile give
452452you in
stance for it. This wonderfully temperd
signior
Candido 453453vppon a time invited home to his hou
se certaine Neapolitane
454454lordes of curious ta
ste, and no meane pallats, conjuring his wife
455455of all loves, to prepare cheere
fitting for
such honourable tren
- 456456cher-men. Shee (ju
st of a womans nature, covetous to trie the
457457vttermo
st of vexation, and thinking at la
st to gette the
starte of
458458his humour) willingly negle
cted the preparation, and became
459459vnfurni
sht, not onely of dainty, but of ordinary di
shes. He (ac
- 460460cording to the mildene
sse of his brea
st) entertained the lordes,
461461and with courtly di
scour
se beguiled the time (as much as a Cit
- 462462tizen might doe:) to conclude, they were hungry lordes, for
463463there came no meate in; their
stomackes were plainely gulld,
464464and their teeth deluded, and (if anger could have
seizd a man)
465465there was matter enough yfaith to vex any citizen in the
466world,
466if hee were not too much made a foole by his wife.
467467Flu. I, Ile
sweare for't: sfoote, had it beene my ca
se, I
should
468468ha playde mad trickes with my wife and family:
fir
st I woulde
469469ha
spitted the men,
stewd the maides, and bak't the mi
stre
sse,
471471Pio. Why twould ha tempred any bloud but his,
472472And thou to vex him? thou to anger him
473473With
some poore
shallow jea
st?
474474Cast. Sbloud
signior
Pioratto, (you that di
sparage my con
- 475475ceit) ile wage a hundred duckats vppon the head on't, that it
476476mooves him,
fretts him, and galles him.
477477Pio. Done, tis a lay, ioyne golls on't: witnes
signior
Fluello.
479479Come, follow mee: the hou
se is not farre o
ff,
480480Ile thru
st him
from his humour, vex his brea
st,
481481And winne a hundred duckats by one iea
st.
Exeunt. 482482Enter Candidoes wife, George, and two prentices 484484Wife Come, you put vp your wares in good order heere, do
485485you not thinke you, one peece ca
st this way, another that way?
486486you had neede have a patient mai
ster indeede.
George
The Honest Whore.
487487George I, ile be
sworne, for we have a cur
st mi
stris.
488488Wife You mumble, do you mumble? I would your mai
ster
489489or I could be a note more angry: for two patient folkes in a
490490hou
se
spoyle all the
servants that ever
shall come vnder them.
4914911. prentise You patient! I,
so is the divell when he is horne
493493Enter Castruchio, Fluello, and Pioratto. 494494All three Gentlemen, what do you lacke? what i
st you buy
? 495495See
fine hollands,
fine cambrickes,
fine lawnes.
496496George What i
st you lacke?
4974972. prentise What i
st you buy?
498498Cast. Wheres
signior
Candido thy mai
ster?
499499George Faith
signior, hees a little negotiated, hee'le appeare (pre
sently.
500500Cast. Fellow, lets
see a lawne, a choice one
sirra.
501501George The be
st in all
Millan, Gentlemen, and this is the
502502peece. I can
fit you Gentlemen with
fine callicoes too for dub
- 503503lets, the onely
sweete fa
shion now, mo
st delicate and courtlie, a
504504meeke gentle calico, cut vpon two double a
ffable ta
ffat
aes, ah,
505505mo
st neate, feate, and vnmatchable.
506506Flu. A notable-voluble tongde villaine.
507507Pio. I warrant this fellow was never begot without much
509509Cast. What, and is this
shee
sai
st thou?
510510George I, and the pure
st shee that ever you
fingerd
since
511you
511were a gentleman: looke how even
she is, look how cleane
512she
512is, ha, as even as the browe of
Cinthia, and as cleane as your
513sonnes
513and heires when they ha
spent all.
514514Cast. Puh, thou talk
st, pox on't tis rough.
515515George How? is
she rough
? but if you bid pox on't
sir, twill
516516take away the roughne
sse pre
sently.
517517Flu. Ha
signior; haz he
fitted your French cur
se?
518518GeorgeLooke you Gentleman, heeres an other, compare
519519them I pray,
compara Virgilium cum Homero, compare virgins
521521Cast. Puh, I ha
seene better, and as you terme them, evener
George
THE HONEST WHORE.
523523Geor. You may
see further for your mind, but tru
st me
524524you
shall not
find better for your body.
Enter Candido. 525525Cast. O here he comes, lets make as tho we pa
sse,
526526Come, come, weele try in
some other
shop.
527527Cand. How now? what's the matter?
528528Geor. The gentlemen
find fault with this lawne, fall out
529529with it, and without a cau
se too.
531531And that makes you to let 'em pa
sse away,
532532Ah, may I craue a word with you gentlemen?
534534Cast. Makes the better for the ie
st.
535535Cand. I pray come neare, - y'are very welcome gallants,
536536Pray pardon my mans rudene
sse, for
I feare me
537537Ha's talkt aboue a prentice with you, - Lawnes!
538538Looke you kind gentlemen - this! no: - I this:
539539Take this vpon my hone
st-dealing faith,
540540To be a true weaue, not too hard, nor
slack,
541541But eene as farre
from fal
shood, as
from black.
542542Cast. Well, how doe you rate it?
543543Cand. Very con
scionably, 18.s. a yard.
544544Cast. That's too deare
: how many yards does the whole
545545piece containe thinke you?
546546Cand. Why,
some 17. yardes
I thinke, or there abouts,
547547How much would
serue your turne? I pray.
548548Cast. Why let me
see - would it were better too.
549549Cand. Truth, tis the be
st in
Millan at fewe words.
550550Cast. Well: let me haue then - a whole penny-worth.
551551Cand. Ha, ha: y'are a merry gentleman.
554554Cast. Of lawne?
I of lawne, a pennorth,
sblood do
st not
555555heare? a whole pennorth, are you dea
ffe?
556556Cand. Dea
ffe? no Syr: but I mu
st tell you,
557557Our wares doe
seldome meete
such cu
stomers.
558558Cast. Nay, and you and your lawnes be
so
squemi
sh,
560560Cand. Pray
stay, a word, pray Signior: for what purpo
se
C Cast
THE HONEST WHORE.
562562Cast. Sblood, whats that to you:
Ile haue a penny worth.
563563Can. A penny-worth
! why you
shall:
Ile
serue you (pre
sently.
5645642. Pren. Sfoot, a penny-worth mi
stris!
565565Mist. A penny-worth! call you the
se Gentlemen?
566566Cast. No, no: not there.
567567Can. What then kinde
Gentle-man
? what at this corner (here?
568568Cast. No nor there neither.
569569Ile haue it iu
st in the middle, or els not.
570570Can. Iu
st in the middle
: - ha - you
shall too: what?
571571Haue you a
single penny>
? 572572Cast. Yes, heeres one.
Can. Lend it me
I pray.
573573Flu. An exlent followed ie
st.
574574Wife. What will he
spoile the Lawne now?
575575Can. Patience, good wife.
576576Wife. I, that patience makes a foole of you: Gentlemen,
577577you might ha found
some other Citizen to haue
578made a
578kind gull on, be
sides my husband.
579579Can. Pray Gentlemen take her to be a woman,
580580Do not regard her language. -- O kinde
soule:
581581Such words will driue away my cu
stomers,
582582Wife. Cu
stomers with a murrē: call you the
se cu
stomers?
583583Can. Patience, good wife.
Wife. Pax, a your patience.
584584Geor. Sfoot mi
stris, I warrant the
se are
some cheating
586586Can. Looke you Gentleman, theres your ware, I thank
587587you, I haue your mony; heare, pray know my
shop, pray
588let me haue your cu
stome.
590589Can. Let me take more of your money.
592591Pio. Harke in thine eare, tha
st lo
st an hundred duckets.
593592Cast. Well, well,
I knowt: i
st po
ssible that
Homo,
594593Should be nor man, nor woman: not once mooud;
595594No not at
such an iniurie, not at all!
596595Sure hees a pigeon, for he has no gall.
597596Flu. Come, come, y'are angry tho you
smother it:
598597Yare vext ifaith, - confe
sse.
Can. Why Gentle-men
599598Should you conceit me to be vext or moou'd?
He
THE HONEST WHORE.
600599He has my ware, I haue his money fort,
601600And thats no Argument I am angry
: no,
602601The be
st Logitian can not proue me
so.
603602Flu. oh, but the hatefull name of a pennyworth of lawne,
604603And then cut out, ith middle of the peece:
605604Pah, I gue
sse it by my
selfe, would moue a Lambe
606605Were he a Lynnen-draper - twould ifaith.
607606Can. Well, giue me leaue to an
swere you for that,
608607Were
set heere to plea
se all cu
stomers,
609608Their humours and their fancies: - o
ffend none:
610609We get by many, if we lee
se by one.
611610May be his minde
stood to no more then that,
612611A penworth
serues him, and mong
st trades tis (found,
613612Deny a pennorth, it may cro
sse a pound.
614613Oh, he that meanes to thriue with patient eye,
615614Mu
st plea
se the diuell, if he come to buy.
616615Flu. O wondrous man, patient boue wrong or woe,
617616How ble
st were men, if women could be
so.
618617Can. And to expre
sse how well my bre
st is plea
sd,
619618And
satis
fied in all: -
George fill a beaker.
Exit George. 620619Ile drinke vnto that Gentleman, who lately
621620Be
stowed his mony with me.
Wife. Gods my life,
622621We
shall haue all our gaines drunke out in beakers,
623622To make amends for pennyworths of lawne.
Enter Georg. 624623Can. Here wife, begin you to the Gentleman.
625624Wife. I begin to him.
Can. George,
filt vp againe:
626625Twas my fault, my hand
shooke.
Exit George. 627626Pio. How
strangely this doth
showe?
628627A patient man linkt with a wa
spi
sh shrowe.
629628Flu. A
siluer and gilt beaker! I haue a tricke
629to worke vp
- 630on that beaker,
sure twil
fret him,
630it cannot choo
se but vexe
631him.
Seig. C
astrachio,
631in pittie to thee,
I haue a cōceit,
632wil
saue
632thy 100. Duckets yet, twil doot,
633 & work him to impatience.
633634Cast. Sweet
Fluello, I
should be bountiful to that conceit.
634635Flu. Well tis enough.
Enter George. 635636Can. Here Gentleman to you,
636637I wi
sh your cu
stome, yare exceeding welcome.
637638Cast. I pledge you
Seig. C
andido, - heere you, that mu
st re
- 638639ceiue a 100. Duccats.
C 2
Pio.
THE HONEST WHORE.
639640Pior. Ile pledge them deepe yfaith
Castruchio,
641642Flu. Come: play't o
ff: to me,
643643Cand. George,
supply the cup.
644644Flu. So,
so, good hone
st George,
645645Here Signior Candido, all this to you.
646646Cand. Oh you mu
st pardon me,
I v
se it not.
647647Flu. Will you not pledge me then?
648648Cand. Yes, but not that:
649649Great loue is
showne in little.
650650Flu. Blurt on your
sentences, - Sfoot you
shall pledge
652652Cand. Indeed
I shall not.
653653Flu. Not pledge me? Sblood,
Ile cary away the beaker (
654then.
654655Cand. The beaker! Oh
! that at your plea
sure
sir.
655656Flu. Now by this drinke I will.
656657Cast. Pledge him, heele do't el
se.
657658Flu. So: I ha done you right, on my thumble naile,
658659What will you pledge me now?
659660Cand. You know me
syr,
I am not of that
sin.
661662Ile beare away the beaker by this light.
662663Cand. Thats as you plea
se, tis very good.
663664Flu. Nay it doth plea
se me, & as you
say, tis a very good (one:
664665Farewell Signior
Candido.
666667Cand. Y'are welcome gentlemen.
667668Cast. Heart not mou'd yet?
668669I thinke his patience is aboue our wit,
669670Geor. I told you before mi
stre
sse, they were all cheaters.
(Exeunt. 670671Wife Why foole, why husband, why madman, I hope
671672you will not let 'em
sneake away
so with a
siluer and gilt
672673beaker, the be
st in the hou
se too: goe fellowes make hue and
674675Cand. Pray let your tongue lye
still, all wil be well:
675676Come hither
George, hye to the Con
stable,
676677And in calme order wi
sh him to attach them,
Make
THE HONEST WHORE.
677678Make no great
stirre, becau
se they're gentlemen,
678679And a thing partly done in meriment.
679680Tis but a
size aboue a ie
st thou know
st,
680681Therefore pur
sue it mildly, goe be gone,
681682The Con
stabl's hard by, bring him along, - make ha
st a
-(gaine.
682683Wife. O y'are a goodly patient Woodcocke, are you not
684685See what your patiēce comes too: euery one
sadles you, and
685686rydes you, youle be
shortly the common
stone-hor
se of
686687Myllan: a womans well holp't vp with
such a meacocke, I
687688had rather haue a husband that would
swaddle me thrice a
688689day, then
such a one, that will be guld twice in halfe an how
- 689690er, Oh
I could burne all the wares in my
shop for anger.
690691Cand. Pray weare a peacefull temper, be my wife,
691692That is, be patient: for a wife and husband
692693Share but one
soule between them: this being knowne,
693694Why
should not one
soule then agree in one
? 694695Wife Hang your agreements: But if my beaker be gone.
(Exit. 695696Enter Castruchio, Fluello, Pioratto, and George. 696697Cand. Oh, heare they come.
697698Geor. The Con
stable
syr, let'em come along with me,
698699becau
se there
should be no wondring, he
staies at dore.
699700Cast. Con
stable goodman
Abram.
700701Flu. Now Signior Candido, Sblood why doe you attach (vs?
701702Cast. Sheart! attach vs
! 702703Cand. Nay
sweare not gallants,
703704Your oathes may moue your
soules, but not moue me,
704705You haue a
siluer beaker of my wiues.
705706Flu. You
say not true: tis gilt.
706707Cand. Then you
say true.
707708And being gilt, the guilt lyes more on you.
708709Cast. I hope y'are not angry
syr.
709710Cand. Then you hope right, for I am not angry.
710711Pio. No, but a little mou'de.
711712Cand. I mou'd! twas you were mou'd, you were brought (hither.
712713Cast. But you (out of your anger & impatience,)
713714Cau
s'd vs to be attacht.
714715Cand. Nay you mi
splace it.
C 3 Out
THE HONEST WHORE.
715716Out of my quiet
su
ffer
aence I did that,
716717And not of any wrath, had I
showne anger,
717718I should haue then pur
sude you with the lawe,
718719And hunted you to
shame, as many worldlings
719720Doe build their anger vpon feebler groundes,
720721The mores the pitty, many loo
se their liues
721722For
scarce
so much coyne as will hide their palme:
722723Which is mo
st cruell, tho
se haue vexed
spirits
723724That pur
sue liues, in this opinion re
st,
724725The lo
sse of Millions could not moue my bre
st.
725726Flu. Thou art a ble
st man, and with peace do
st deale,
726727Such a meeke
spirit can ble
sse a common weale.
727728Cand. Gentlemen, now tis vpon eating time,
728729Pray part not hence, but dyne with me today.
729730Cast. I neuer heard a carter yet
say nay
730731To
such a motion.
Ile not be the
fir
st.
733734Cand. The con
stable
shall beare you company,
734735George call him in, let the world
say what it can,
735736Nothing can driue me
from a patient man.
(Exeunt. 736737Enter Roger with a stoole, cushin, looking-glasse and chafing-dish, 737738 Those being set downe, he pulls out of his pocket, a violl with 738739 white cullor in it. And 2. boxes, one with white, another red 739740 painting, he places all things in order & a candle by thē, singing 740741 with the ends of old Ballads as he does it. At last Bella- 741742 front (as he rubs his cheeke with the cullors, whistles with- 744745Bel. What are you playing the roague about?
745746Ro. About you, for
sooth:
I me drawing vp a hole in your
747748Bell. Is my gla
sse there? and my boxes of complexion?
748749Ro. Yes for
sooth: your boxes of complexion are
749750here
I thinke: yes tis here: her's your twe complexi
- 750751ons, and if I had all the foure complexions,
I should
751752nere
set a good face vpont,
some men
I see are borne vn
- 752753der hard-fauourd plānets as well as women: zounds
I looke
worse
THE HONEST WHORE.
753754wor
se now then
I did before, & it makes her face gli
ster mo
st 754755damnably, theres knauery in dawbing I hold my life, or el
se
755756this is onely female
Pomatum.
756757 Enter Bellafronte not full ready, without a gowne, shee sits 757758downe, with her bodkin curles her haire, cullers her lips. 758759Bell. Wheres my ru
ffe and poker you block-head
? 759760Ro. Your ru
ffe, your pocker, are ingendring together
761vp
- 760on the cup-bord of the Court, or the Court-cup-bord.
761762Bel. Fetch e'm: Is the poxe in your hames, you can goe
763764Ro. Wood the pox were in your
fingers, vnle
sse you could
764765leaue
flinging; catch.
Exit. 765766Bell. Ile catch you, you dog by and by
: do you grumble?
766767 Cupid
is a God, as naked as my naile She sings. 767768 Ile whip him with a rod, if he my true loue faile.
768769Ro. Thers your ru
ffe,
shall I poke it?
769770Bel. Yes hone
st Ro, no
stay
: pry thee good boy, hold here,
770771 Downe, downe, downe, down, I fall downe and arise, downe, I ne- 772773Ro. Troth M. then leaue the trade if you
shall neuer ri
se.
773774Bell. What trade? good-man
Abram.
774775Ro. Why that, if down and ari
se or the falling trade.
775776Bell. Ile fall with you by and by.
776777Ro. If you doe
I know who
shall
smart fort:
777778Troth Mi
stris, what do
I looke like now?
778779Bell. Like as you are: a panderly Sixpenny Ra
scall.
779780Ro. I may thanke you for that: infaith
I looke like an old
780781Prouerbe,
Hold the Candle before the diuell.
781782Bell. Vds life,
Ile
sticke my knife in your Guts and you
782783prate to me
so:
What?
She sings. 783784 Well met, pug, the pearle of beautie: vmh, vmh. 784785 How now sir knaue, you forget your dutie, vmh, vmh. 785786 Marry muffe Sir, are you growne so daintie; fa, la, la, &c. 786787 Is it you Sir?
the worst of twentie, fa la, la, leera la. 787788Pox on you, how doe
st thou hold my gla
sse?
788789Ro. Why, as
I hold your doore: with my
fingers.
789790Hell. Nay pray thee
sweet hony
Ro. hold vp hand
somely
790791Sing prety Wantons warble, &c. We
shall ha gue
sts today.
I lay
THE HONEST WHORE.
791792I lay my little meadenhead, my no
se itches
so.
792793Ro. I said
so too la
st night, when our Fleas twing'd me.
793794Bell. So Poke my ru
ffe now, my gowne, my gown, haue (I my fall
? 794795Wher's my fall
Roger?
One knocks. 795796Ro. Your fall for
sooth is behind.
796797Bell. Gods my pittikins,
some foole or other knocks.
797798Ro. Shall
I open to the foole mi
stre
sse?
798799Bell. And all the
se bables lying thus? away with it quick
- 799800ly, I, I, knock & be dambde, who
soeuer you be. So: giue the
800801fre
sh Salmon lyne now: let him come a
shoare, hee
shall
801802serue for my breakefa
st, tho he goe again
st my
stomack.
802803Roger Fetch in Fluello, Castruchio, and Pioratto. 804805Cast. How does my
sweete acquaintance?
805806Pio. Saue thee little Marmo
set: how doe
st thou good
807808Bell. Well, Godamercy good pretty ra
scall.
808809Flu. Roger some light
I pry thee.
809810Ro. You
shall
Signior, for we that liue here in this vale
810811of mi
sery, are as darke as hell.
Exit. for a candle. 811812Cast. Good Tabacco,
Fluello?
812813Flu. Smell?
(Enter Roger. 813814Pio. It may be tickling geere: for it plaies with my no
se (already.
814815Ro. Her's another light Angell,
Signior.
815816Bell. What? yon pyed curtal, whats that you are neighing?
816817Ro. I
say God
send vs the light of heauen, or
some more
818819Bell. Goe fetch
some wyne, and drinke halfe of it.
819820Ro. I mu
st fetch
some wyne gentlemen and drinke halfe (of it.
821822Cast. No let me
send pry thee.
822823Flu. Hold you canker worme.
823824Ro. You
shall
send both, if you plea
se
Signiors.
824825Pio. Stay, whats be
st to drinke a mornings?
825826Ro. Hypocras
sir, for my mi
stres, if I fetch it, is mo
st deare (to her.
826827Flu. Hypocras! ther then, her's a te
ston for you, you
snake
827828Ro. Right
syr, her's iij. s. vi. d. for a pottle & a manchet-
Ex. Her's
THE HONEST WHORE.
828829Cast. Her's mo
st herculaniā Tobacco, ha
some acquaintāce?
829830Bel. Fah, not
I, makes your breath
stinke, like the pi
sse of a
830831Foxe. Acquaintance, where
supt you la
st night?
831832Cast. At a place
sweete acquaintance where your health
832833danc'de the
Canaries y'faith: you
should ha ben there.
833834Bell. I there among your Punkes, marry fah, hang-em:
834835scorn't: will you neuer leaue
sucking of egs in other folkes
836837Cast. Why in good troth, if youle tru
st me acquaintance,
837838there was not one hen at the board, aske
Fluello.
838839Flu. No faith Coz; none but
Cocks,
signior
Malauella 839840drunke to thee.
Bel. O, a pure beagle; that hor
se-leach there?
840841Flu. And the knight, S.
Oliuer Lollilo,
swore he wold be
stow
841842a ta
ffata petticoate on thee, but to breake his fa
st with thee.
842843Bel. With me! Ile choake him then, hang him Mole-cat
- 843844cher, its the dreaming
st snotty-no
se.
844845Pio. Well, many tooke that
Lollio for a foole, but he's a
845846subtile foole.
Bel. I, and he has fellowes: of all
filthy
846847dry-
fisted knights,
I cannot abide that he
should touch me.
847848Cast. Why wench, is he
scabbed?
848849Bel. Hang him, heele not liue to bee
so hone
st, nor to the
849850credite to haue
scabbes about him, his betters haue em: but
850851I hate to weare out any of his cour
se knight-hood, becau
se
851852hee's made like an Aldermans night-gowne, fac
st all with
852853conny before, and within nothing but Foxe: this
sweete
853854Oliuer, will eate Mutton till he be ready to bur
st, but the
854855leane iawde-
slaue wil not pay for the
scraping of his trēcher.
855856Pio. Plague him,
set him beneath the
sault, and let him not
856857touch a bit, till euery one has had his full cut.
857858Flu. Lord Ello, the Gentleman-V
sher came into vs too,
858859marry twas in our chee
se, for he had beene to borrow mony
859860for his Lord, of a Citizen.
860861Cast. What an a
sse is that Lord, to borrow money of a
862863Bell. Nay, Gods my pitty, what an a
sse is that Citizen to
864865 Enter Matheo and Hypolito, who saluting the Com- 865866pany, as a stranger walkes off. Roger comes in sadly behind them, D with
THE HONEST WHORE.
866867with a potle-pot, and stands aloofe off. 867868Matheo. Saue you Gallants,
signior
Fluello, exceedingly
869870Flu. Signior
Matheo, exceedingly well met too, as I may
871872Ma. And how fares my little prettie Mi
stris?
872873Bell. Eene as my little pretie
seruant;
sees three court di
- 873874shes before her, and not one good bit in them: how now?
874875why the diuell
stand
st thou
so? Art in a trance?
875876Ro. Yes for
sooth.
Bell Why do
st not
fil out their wine?
876877Ro. For
sooth tis
fild out already: all the wine that the
sig
- 877878nior has be
stowde vpon you is ca
st away, a Porter ranne a
878879litle at me, and
so fac'
st me downe that
I had not a drop.
879880Bel. Ime a cur
st to let
such a withered Artichocke faced
- 880881Ra
scall grow vnder my no
se: now you looke like an old he
881882cat, going to the gallowes: Ile be hangde if he ha not put vp
882883the mony to cony-catch vs all.
883884Ro. No truely for
sooth, tis not put vp yet.
884885Bel. How many Gentlemen ha
st thou
serued thus?
885886Ro. None but
fiue hundred, be
sides prentices and
seruing
-(men.
886887Bell Doe
st thinke
Ile pocket it vp at thy hands?
887888Ro. Yes for
sooth,
I feare you will pocket it vp.
888889Bel Fye, fye, cut my lace good
seruant,
I shall ha the mo
- 889890ther pre
sently Im'e
so vext at this hor
se-plumme.
890891Flu. Plague, not for a
scald pottle of wine.
891892Ma. Nay,
sweete
Bellafronte, for a little Pigs wa
sh.
892893Cast. Here
Roger, fetch more, a mi
schance. Yfaith Ac
- 894895Bell Out of my
sight, thou vngodly puritanical creature.
895896Ro. For the tother pottle? yes for
sooth.
Exit. 896897Bell. Spill that too: what
Gentleman is that
seruant? your
898899Ma. Gods
so a
stoole, a
stoole, if you loue me Mi
stris en
- 899900tertaine this Gentleman re
spe
ctiuely, & bid him welcome.
900901Bell. Hees very welcome, pray Sir
sit.
902903Flu. Count
Hypolito, i
st not
? cry you mercie
signior, you
903904walke here all this while, and we not heard you? let me be
- stow
THE HONEST WHORE.
904905stowa
stoole vpō you be
seech you, you are a
stranger here,
905906we know the fa
shions ath hou
se.
906907Cast. Plea
se you be heere my Lord.
Tabacco. 907908Hipo. No good
Castruchio.
908909Flu. You haue abandoned the Court
I see my lord
since
909910the death of your mi
stre
sse, well
she was a delicate piece-be
- 910911seech you
sweete, come let vs
serue vnder the cullors of your
911912acquaintance
stil: for all that, plea
se you to meete here at my
912913lodging of my cuz,
I shall be
stow a banquet vpon you.
913914Hipo. I neuer can de
serue this kindne
sse
syr.
914915What may this Lady be, whom you call cuz?
915916Flu. Faith
syr a poore gentlewoman, of pa
ssing good ca
- 916917riage, one that has
some
sutes in law, and lyes here in an At
- 919920Flu. Hah, as all your punks are, a captens wife, or
so?
920921neuer
saw her before, my Lord.
921922Hipo. Neuer tru
st me a goodly creature.
922923Flu. By gad when you know her as we do, youle
swear
she is
923924the prettie
st, kinde
st,
sweete
st, mo
st bewitching hone
st ape
924925vnder the pole. A skin, your
satten is not more
soft, nor
926927Hipo. Belike then
shees
some
sale curtizan.
927928Flu. Troth as all your be
st faces are, a good wench.
928929Hipo. Great pitty that
shees a good wench:
929930Ma. Thou
shalt ha ifaith mi
stre
sse
: how now
signiors?
930931what? whi
spering? did not
I lay a wager I
should take you
931932within
seuen daies in a hou
se of vanity.
932933Hipo. You did, and I be
shrew your heart, you haue won.
933934Ma. How do you like my mi
stre
sse?
934935Hipo. Well, for
such a mi
stre
sse: better, if your mi
stre
sse
936937I mu
st breake manners gentlemen, fare you well.
937938Ma. Sfoote you
shall not leaue vs.
938939Bell. The gentleman likes not the ta
st of our company,
940941Hipo. Tru
st me my a
ffaires becken for me, pardon me.
941942Ma. Will you call for me halfe an houre hence here?
D 2 Hipo.
THE HONEST WHORE.
943944Ma. Perhaps
? fah!
I know you can
sweare to me you wil,
944945Hip. Since you will pre
sse me on my word,
I will.
Exit. 945946Bell. What
sullen pi
cture is this
seruant?
946947Ma. Its Count
Hipolito, the braue Count.
947948Pio. As gallant a
spirit, as any in
Millan you
sweete (
Iewe,
948949Flu. Oh hees a mo
st e
ssentiall gentleman, coz.
949950Cast. Did you neuer heare of Count
Hipolitos ac
- 951952Bell. Marymu
ffe a your counts, & be no more life in'em.
952953Ma. Hees
so malcontent!
sirra
Bellafronta, & you be ho
- 953954ne
st gallants, lets
sup together, and haue the count with vs:
954955thou
shalt
sit at the vpper end puncke.
955956Bell. Puncke, you
sowcde gurnet?
956957Ma. Kings truce: come, ile be
stow the
supper to haue
958959Cast. He betraies his youth too gro
sly to that tyrant ma
-(lancholy.
959960Ma. All this is for a woman.
960961Bell. A woman
! some whore! what
sweet
Iewell i
st?
961962Pio. Wod
she heard you.
Flu. Troth
so wud
I.
963964Bell. Nay good
seruant, what woman?
Ma. Pah.
964965Bell. Pry thee tell me, abu
sse and tell me:
I warrant hees
965966an hone
st fellowe, if hee take on thus for a wench: good
967968Ma. Byth Lord
I will not, mu
st not faith mi
stre
sse: i
st a
968969match
sirs? his night, at
Th'antilop: I, for thers be
st wine, and (good boyes.
969970Omni. Its done at Th'antilop.
970971Bell. I cannot be there to night.
971972Ma. Cannot? bith lord you
shall.
972973Bell. By the Lady I will not:
shaall
! 973974Flu. Why then put it o
ff till
fryday: wut come then cuz?
974975Bell. Well.
Enter Roger. 975976Ma. Y'are the wa
spi
she
st Ape.
Roger, put your mis
- 976tre
sse in
977mind to
sup with vs on
friday
978next: y'are be
st come
977like a madwoman without a band in
979your wa
stcoate, & the
978lynings of your kirtle outward, like
980euery common hackney
979that
steales out at the back gate of her
981sweet knights lodging
Bell.
THE HONEST WHORE.
980982Bell. Goe, goe, hang your
selfe.
Cast. Its dinner time
Matheo, (
shalls hence
? 981983Omni. Yes, yes, farewell wench.
Exeunt. 982984Bell. Farewell boyes:
Roger what wine
sent they for?
983985Ro. Ba
stard wine, for if it had bin truly begotten, it wud
984986not ha bin a
shamde to come in, her's vi.s. to pay for nur
sing
986988Bell. A company of rookes! O good
sweete
Roger, run to
987989the Poulters and buy me
some
fine Larkes.
989991Bell. Yes faith a couple, if they be not deare.
990992Ro. Ile buy but one, theres one already here.
Exit. 992994Hipo. Is the gentleman (my
friend) departed mi
stre
sse?
993995Bell. His backe is but new-turnd
syr.
994996Hipo. Fare you well.
Bell. I can dire
ct you to him.
996998Bell. If you plea
se
stay, heele not be ab
sent long.
9981000Bell. Pray
sit for
sooth.
Hipo. I'me hot.
9991001Hipo. If may v
se your roome, ile rather walke.
10001002Bell. At your be
st plea
sure-whew-
some rubbers there.
10011003Hipo. Indeed ile non: -Indeed
I will not: thanks.
10021004Pretty-
fine-lodging. I perceiue my
friend
10031005Is old in your acquaintance.
Bell. Troth
syr, he comes
10041006As other gentlemen, to
spend
spare howers;
10051007If your
selfe like our roofe (
such as it is)
10061008Your owne acquaintance may be as old as his.
10071009Hipo. Say
I did like; what welcome
should
I find
? 10081010Bell. Such as my pre
sent fortunes can a
fford.
10091011Hipo. But would you let me play
Mathaeos part?
10111013Hipo. Why imbrace you: dally with you, ki
sse:
10121014Faith tell me, will you leaue him, and loue me?
10131015Bell. I am in bondes to no man
syr.
Hipo. Why then,
10141016Y'are
free for any man: if any, me.
10151017But
I mu
st tell you Lady, were you mine,
10161018You
should be all mine: I could brooke no
sharers,
10171019I should be couetous, and
sweepe vp all.
D 3 I would
THE HONEST WHORE.
10181020I
should be plea
sures v
surer: faith I
should.
10201022Hipo. Why
sigh you Lady? may I knowe?
10211023Bell. T'has neuer bin my fortune yet to
single
10221024Out that one man, who
se loue could fellow mine.
10231025As
I haue euer wi
sht it: ô my Stars
! 10241026Had
I but met with one kind gentleman,
10251027That would haue purchacde
sin alone, to him
selfe,
10261028For his owne priuate v
se, although
scarce proper:
10271029Indi
fferent han
some: meetly legd and thyed:
10281030And my allowance rea
sonable-yfaith,
10291031According to my body-by my troth,
10301032I would haue bin as true vnto his plea
sures,
10311033Yea, and as loyall to his afternoones,
10321034As euer a poore gentlewoman could be.
10331035Hipo. This were well now, to one but newly
fledg'd,
10341036And
scarce a day old in this
suttle world:
10351037Twere prettie Art, good bird-lime, cunning net:
10361038But come, come, faith-confe
sse: how many men
10371039Haue drunke this
selfe-
same prote
station,
10421044Hipo. Indeed
! in truth!-how warily you
sweare?
10431045Tis well: if ill it be not: yet had
I 10441046The ru
ffian in me, and were drawne before you
10451047But in light cullors,
I doe know indeed,
10461048You could not
sweare indeede, But thunder oathes
10471049That
should
shake heauen, drowne the harmonious
sphers,
10481050And pierce a
soule (that lou'd her makers honour)
10531055Our
sins by cu
stome,
seeme (at la
st) but
small.
10541056Were I but o're your thre
shold, a next man,
10551057And after him a next, and then a fourth,
Should
THE HONEST WHORE.
10561058Should haue this golden hooke, and la
sciuious baite,
10571059Throwne out to the full length, why let me tell you:
10581060I ha
seene letters
sent
from that white hand,
10591061Tuning
such mu
sicke to
Matheos eare.
10601062Bell. Mathaeo! thats true, but beleeue it, I
1061No
sooner had laid hold vpon your pre
sence,
1062But
straight mine eye conueid you to my heart.
10631065Hipo. Oh, you cannot faine with me, why,
I know Lady,
10641066This is the common pa
ssion of you all,
10651067To hooke in a kind gentleman, and then
10661068Abu
se his coyne, conueying it to your louer,
10671069And in the end you
shew him a french trick,
10681070And
so you leaue him, that a coach may run
10711073Not I: therein ile proue an hone
st whore,
10721074In being true to one, and to no more.
10731075Hipo. If any be di
spo
sde to tru
st your oath,
10741076Let him: ile not be he, I know you feine
10751077All that you
speake, I: for a mingled harlot,
10761078Is true in nothing but in being fal
se.
10771079What!
shall
I teach you how to loath your
selfe?
10781080And mildly too
: not without
sen
se or rea
son.
10791081Bell. I am content, I would faine loath my
selfe,
10811083Hipo. Then if your gratious blood be not all wa
sted,
10831085Lend me your
silence, and attention,- you haue no
soule,
10841086That makes you wey
so light: heauens trea
sure bought it,
10851087And halfe a crowne hath
sold it: for your body
10861088Is like the common
shoare, that
still receiues
10871089All the townes
filth.
The
sin of many men
10881090Is within you, and thus much
I suppo
se,
10891091That if all your committers
stood in ranke,
10901092Theide make a lane, (in which your
shame might dwell)
10911093And with their
spaces reach
from hence to hell.
10921094Nay,
shall
I vrge it more, there has bene knowne,
As
THE HONEST WHORE.
10931095As many by one harlot, maym'd and di
smembred,
10941096As would ha
stuft an Ho
spitall: this
I might
10951097Apply to you, and perhaps doe you right:
10961098O y'are as ba
se as any bea
st that beares,
10971099Your body is ee'ne hirde, and
so are theirs.
10981100For gold and
sparkling iewels, (if he can)
10991101Youle let a
Iewe get you with chri
stian:
11001102Be he a Moore, a Tartar, tho his face
11011103Looke vglier then a dead mans
scull,
11021104Could the diuel put on a humane
shape,
11031105If his pur
se
shake out crownes, vp then he gets,
11041106Whores will be rid to hell with golden bits:
11051107So that y'are crueller then Turkes, for they
11061108Sell Chri
stians onely, you
sell your
selues away.
11071109Why tho
se that loue you, hate you
: and will terme you
11081110Lickeri
sh damnation: wi
sh them
selues halfe
sunke
11091111After the
sin is laid out, and ee'ne cur
se
11101112Their
fruitle
sse riot, (for what one begets
11111113Another poi
sons) lu
st and murder hit,
11121114A tree being often
shooke, what
fruit can knit?
11151117A harlot is like
Dunkirke, true to none,
11161118Swallowes both Engli
sh, Spani
sh, ful
some Dutch,
11171119Blacke-doord Italian, la
st of all the
French,
11181120And he
sticks to you faith
: giues you your diet,
11191121Brings you acquainted,
fir
st with mon
sier Do
ctor,
11201122And then you know what followes.
11221124Ranke,
stinking, and mo
st loath
some mi
sery.
11231125Hip. Me thinks a toad is happier then a whore,
11241126That with one poi
son
swells, with thou
sands more
11251127The other
stocks her veines: harlot:
fie!
fie,
11261128You are the mi
serable
st Creatures breathing,
11271129The very
slaues of nature: marke me el
se,
11281130You put on rich attires, others eyes weare them,
11291131You eat, but to
supply your blood with
sin,
11301132And this
strange cur
se ee'ne haunts you to your graues.
From
THE HONEST WHORE.
11311133From fooles you get, and
spend it vpon
slaues:
11321134Like Beares and Apes, y'are bayted and
shew tricks
11331135For money; but your Bawd the
sweetne
sse licks.
11341136Indeed you are their Iourney-women, and doe
11351137All ba
se and damnd workes they li
st set you to:
11361138So that you n'ere are rich; for doe but
shew me,
11371139In pre
sent memory, or in ages pa
st,
11381140The fayre
st and mo
st famous Courtezan,
11391141Who
se
fle
sh was dear'
st; that rai
sd the price of
sin,
11401142And held it vp; to who
se intemperate bo
some,
11411143Princes, Earles, Lords, the wor
st has bin a knight,
11421144The mean'
st a Gentleman, haue o
ffred vp
11431145Whole Hecatombs of
sighs, & raind in
showres
11441146Handfuls of gold, yet for all this, at la
st 11451147Di
sea
ses
suckt her marrow, then grew
so poore,
11461148That
she has begd, e'ene at a beggers doore.
11471149And (wherin heau'n has a
singer) when this Idoll,
11481150From coa
st to coa
st, has leapt on forrayne
shores,
11491151And had more wor
ship, thē th'outlandi
sh whores:
11501152When
seuerall Nations haue gone ouer her,
11511153When for eache
seuerall City
she has
seene,
11521154Her Maydenhead has bin new, & bin
sold deare:
11531155Did liue wel there, & might haue dyde vnknown,
11541156And vndefam'd; back comes
she to her owne,
11551157And there both mi
serably liues and dyes,
11561158Scornd euen of tho
se, that once ador'd her eyes,
11571159As if her fatall-circled life, thus ranne,
11581160Her pride
should end there, where it
fir
st began.
11591161What do you weepe to heare your Story read?
11601162Nay, if you
spoyle your cheeks, Ile read no more.
11621164Indeed 'twill do me good to weepe indeed.
11631165Hip. To giue tho
se teares a relli
sh, this I adde,
11641166Y'are like the Iewes,
scatterd, in no place certain,
11651167Your daies are tedious, your houres burden
some:
11661168And wer't not for full
suppers, midnight Reuels,
11671169Dauncing, wine, ryotous meetings, which doe drowne,
11681170And bury quite in you all vertuous thoughts,
E And
THE HONEST WHORE.
11691171And on your eye-lids hang
so heauily,
11701172They haue no power to looke
so high as heauen,
11711173Youde
sit and mu
se on nothing but de
spayre,
11721174Cur
se that deuil
Lust, that
so burnes vp your blood,
11731175And in ten thou
sand
shiuers breake your gla
sse
11741176For his temptation. Say you ta
ste delight,
11751177To haue a golden Gull
from rize to Set,
11761178To meat you in his hote luxurious armes,
11771179Yet your nights pay for all: I know you dreame
11781180Of warrants, whips, & Beadles, and then
start
11791181At a dores windy creake: thinke euery Weezle
11801182To be a Con
stable: and euery Rat
11811183A long tayld O
fficer: Are you now not
slaues?
11821184Oh you haue damnation without plea
sure for it!
11831185Such is the
state of Harlots. To conclude,
11841186When you are old, and can well paynt no more,
11851187You turne Bawd, and are then wor
se then before
: 11881190Hip. See
Matheo comes not: time hath bard me,
11891191Would all the Harlots in the towne had heard me.
Exit. 11901192Bel. Stay yet a little longer. no: quite gone!
11911193Cur
st be that minute (for it was no more.
11921194So
soone a mayd is chang'd into a Whore)
11931195Wherein I
fir
st fell, be it for euer blacke;
11941196Yet why
should
sweet
Hipolito shun mine eyes;
11951197For who
se true loue I would becom pure-hone
st,
11961198Hate the worlds mixtures, & the
smiles of gold:
11971199Am I not fayre? Why
should he
flye me then?
11981200Faire creatures are de
sir'd, not
scornd of men.
11991201How many Gallants haue drunk healthes to me,
12001202Out of their daggerd armes, & thought thē ble
st,
12011203Enioying but mine eyes at prodigall fea
sts!
12021204And does
Hipolito dete
st my loue?
12031205Oh,
sure their heedle
sse lu
sts but
flattred me,
12041206I am not plea
sing, beautifull nor young.
12051207Hipolito hath
spyed
some vgly blemi
sh,
12061208Eclip
sing all my beauties: I am foule:
Harlot!
THE HONEST WHORE.
12071209Harlot! I, that's the
spot that taynts my
soule:
1208What! has he left
1210his weapon heere behind him,
1209And gone forgetfull? O
fit in
strument
12101211To let forth all the poy
son of my
fle
sh!
12111212Thy M. hates me, cau
se my bloud hath rang'd:
12121213But whē tis forth, then heele beleeue Ime chāg'd.
12131214Hip. Mad woman, what art doing?
Enter Hipo. 12151216Or
split my heart vpon thy Rapiers poynt:
12161217Yet doe not neyther; for thou then de
stroy
st 12171218That which I loue thee for (thy vertues) here, here,
12181219Th'art crueller, and kil
st me with di
sdayne:
12191220To die
so,
sheds no bloud, yet tis wor
se payne.
ExitHipol. 12201221Not
speake to me! not bid farewell! a
scorne!
12211222Hated! this mu
st not be,
some meanes Ile try.
12221223Would all Whores were as hone
st now, as I.
Exeunt. 12241225Enter Candido, his wife, George, and two Prentices in the 12251226shop: Fustigo enters, walking by. 12261227Geor. See Gentlemen, what you lack? a
fine Holland,
12271228a
fine Cambrick,
see what you buy.
122812291. Pr. Holland for
shirts, Cambrick for bands, what i
st (you lack?
12291230Fust. Sfoot, I lack em all, nay more, I lack money to buy
12301231em: let me
see, let me looke agen: ma
sse this is the
shop;
12311232What Coz!
sweet Coz! how do
st ifayth,
since la
st night
12321233after candlelight? we had good
sport ifayth, had we not?
12351236Fust. Spoke like a kind Lacedemoniā: I
see yonders thy (husband.
12361237Wi. I, ther's the
sweet youth, God ble
sse him.
12371238Fust. And how i
st Cozen? & how? how i
st thou
squall?
12391240Fust. How fare I? troth, for
sixpence a meale, wench, as
12401241wel as heart can wi
sh, with Calues chaldrons and chitter
- 12411242lings, be
sides I haue a
Punck after
supper, as good as a ro
-(a
sted Apple.
12431244Fust. A am,
sir, what ha
st thou to do with that?
12441245Cand. O, nothing but y'are welcome.
E 2 Fust. The
THE HONEST WHORE.
12451246Fust. The Deuils dung in thy teeth: Ile be welcom whe
- 12461247ther thou wilt or no, I: What Ring's this Coz? very pretty
12471248and fanta
sticall ifayth, lets
see it.
12481249Wife Puh! nay you wrench my
finger.
12491250Fust. I ha
sworne Ile ha't, and I hope you wil not let my
12501251othes be crackt in the ring, wil you? I hope,
sir, you are not
12511252mallicolly at this for all your great lookes: are you angry?
12521253Cand. Angry? not I
sir, nay, if
she can part
12531254So ea
sily with her Ring, tis with my heart.
12541255Geo. Su
ffer this,
sir, &
su
ffer all, a whore
son Gull, to --,
12551256Can. Peace,
George, whē
she has reapt what I haue
sown,
12561257Sheele
say, one grayne ta
stes better of her owne,
12571258Then whole
sheaues gatherd
from anothers land:
12581259Wit's neuer good, till bought at a deare hand.
12591260Geo. But in the meane time
she makes an A
sse of
some (body.
126012612. Pren. See,
see,
see,
sir, as you turne your backe, they
12621263Cand. No matter, let 'em: when I touch her lip,
12631264I
shall not feele his ki
sses, no nor mi
sse
12641265Any of her lip: no harme in ki
ssing is.
12651266Looke to your bu
sine
sse, pray, make vp your wares.
12661267Fust. Troth Coz, and well remembred, I would thou
12671268would
st giue mee
fiue yards of Lawne, to make my
Punke 12681269some falling bands a the fa
shiō, three falling one vpon ano
- 12691270ther: for that's the new editiō now:
she's out of linnen hor
- 12701271ribly too, troth,
sha's neuer a good
smock to her back ney
- 12711272ther, but one that has a great many patches in't, & that I'm
12721273faine to weare my
selfe for want of
shift to: prithee put me
12731274into hole
som napery, & be
stow
some cleane commodities
12741275vpō vs.
Wife. Reach me tho
se Cambricks, & the Lawnes
12751276hither.
Cand. What to doe wife? to laui
sh out my goods
12771278Fust. Foole! Sneales eate the foole, or Ile
so batter your
12781279crowne, that it
shall
scarce go for
fiue
shillings.
127912802. Pr. Do you heare
sir? y'are be
st be quiet, &
say a foole (tels you
so.
12801281Fust. Nailes, I think
so, for thou tel
st me.
12811282Can. Are you angry
sir, becau
se I namde the foole?
12821283Tru
st me, you are not wi
se, in mine owne hou
se;
And
THE HONEST WHORE.
12831284And to my face to play the Anticke thus:
12841285If youle needs play the madman, choo
se a
stage
12851286Of le
sser compa
sse, where few eyes may note
12861287Your a
ctions errour; but if
still you mi
sse,
12871288As heere you doe, for one clap, ten will hi
sse.
12881289Fust. Zwounds Cozen, he talks to me, as if I were a
scur
- 129012912. pren. Sirra
George, I ha thought vpon a deuice, how to
12911292breake his pate, beat him
soundly, and
ship him away.
12921293Geor. Doo't.
2. Pre. Ile go in, pa
sse thorow the hou
se,
12931294giue
some of our fellow Prentices the watch-word when
12941295they
shal enter, then come & fetch my ma
ster in by a
1296wile,
1295and place one in the hall to hold him in conference,
1297whil
st 1296we cudgell the Gull out of his coxcombe.
12981299Wife. Mu
st I call twice for the
se Cambricks & lawnes?
12991300Cand. Nay
see, you anger her,
George, prithee di
spatch.
130013012. pr. Two of the choi
se
st pieces are in the warehou
se
sir.
13011302Cand. Go fetch them pre
sently.
Exit 1. prentice. 13031304Cand. Why were you
such a
stranger all this while,
13051306Fust. Stranger? no
sir, I me a naturall Millaner borne.
13061307Can. I perceyue
still it is your naturall guize to mi
stake
13071308me, but you are welcom
sir, I much wi
sh your acquaintāce.
13081309Fust. My acquaintance? I
scorne that ifayth; I hope my
13091310acquaintance goes in chaines of gold three and
fifty times
13101311double: you know who I meane, Coz, the po
sts of his gate
13111312are a paynting to.
Enter the 2. Prentice. 131213132. Pren. Signior Pandulfo the Marchāt de
sires conference
13131314with you.
Can. Signior Pandulfo? Ile be with him
straight.
13141315Attend your mi
stris and the Gentleman.
Exit. 13151316Wife. When do you
shew tho
se pieces?
1316Fust. I, when doe you
shew tho
se pieces?
13171317Omn. Pre
sently
sir, pre
sently, we are but charging thē.
13181318Fust. Come
sirra, you Flat-cap, where be the
se whites?
13191319Geo. Flat-cap? heark in your eare
sir, yare a
flat foole, an
13201320A
sse, a gull, & Ile thrum you: do you
see this cambrick
sir?
E 3 Fust. Sfoot,
THE HONEST WHORE.
13211321Fust. Sfoot Coz, a good ie
st, did you heare him? he told
13221322me in my eare,
I was a
flat foole, an A
sse, a Gull, and
Ile
13231323thrumb you: doe you
see this Cambrick
sir?
13251325Fust. No, not your men, but one of your men ifayth.
132613261. Pr. I pray
sir, come hither, what
say you to this? here
13281328Fust. I marry, this likes me well, cut me o
ff some halfe (
score yards.
132913292. Pr. Let your whores cut, yare an impudent coxcomb,
13301330you get none, & yet Ile thrum you.- A very good Cam
- 13321332Fust. Agen, agen, as God iudge me: Sfoot, Coz, they
13331333stand thrūming here with me all day, & yet
I get nothing.
133413341. Pr. A word
I pray
sir, you mu
st not be angry, prentices
13351335haue hote blouds, young fellowes,- What
say you to this
13361336piece? looke you, tis
so delicate,
so
soft,
so euen,
so
fine a
13371337thrid, that a Lady may weare it.
13381338Fust. Sfoot
I thinke
so, if a Knight marry my Punck, a
13391339Lady
shall weare it: cut me o
ff 20. yards: th'art an hone
st (lad.
134013401. Pr. Not without mony, gull, & ile thrū you to.
13421342Fust. O Lord,
sister, did you not heare
something cry
13431343thrum? zounds your men here make a plaine A
sse of me.
13441344Wi. What, to my face
so impudent?
13451345Geor. I, in a cau
se
so hone
st, weele not
su
ffer
13461346Our ma
sters goods to vani
sh mony le
sse.
13491349In going about to vex
so mild a bre
st,
13501350As is our ma
sters.
Wi. Take away tho
se pieces.
13521352Fust. Ma
sse, and
Ile take em as
freely.
13531353Om. Weele make you lay em down agen more
freely.
13541354Wi. Help, help, my brother wilbe murdered.
Enter Can. 13551355Cand. How now, what coyle is here? forbeare, I
say.
13561356Geor. He cals vs Flatcaps, and abu
ses vs.
13571357Can. Why,
sirs? do
such examples
flow
from me?
13581358Wi. They are of your keeping
sir, alas poore brother.
Fust. I
THE HONEST WHORE.
13591359Fust. I fayth they ha pepperd me,
sister: looke, doo
st not
13601360spin? call you the
se Prentices? Ile nere play at cards more
13611361whē clubs is trump: I haue a goodly coxcomb,
sister, haue (I not?
13621362Cand. Si
ster and brother, brother to my wife.
13631363Fust. If you haue any skill in Heraldry, you may
soone
13641364know that, break but her pate, and you
shall
see her blood
13661366Can. A Surgeon, run, a Surgeon: Why then wore you
13681368Fust. Becau
se its a common thing to call Coz, and min
- 13691369gle now adayes all the world ouer.
13701370Cand. Cozen! A name of much deceyt, folly and
sin,
13711371For vnder that common abu
sed word,
13731373Is made a mon
ster, and his wife traynd out
13741374To foule adulterous a
ction, full of
fraud.
13751375I may well call that word, A Cities Bawd.
13761376Fust. Troth, brother, my
sister would needs ha me take
13771377vpon me to gull your patience a little: but it has made
13791379Wife. What, playing the woman? blabbing now you (foole?
13801380Cand. O, my wife did but exerci
se a ie
st vpon your wit.
13811381Fust. Sfoot, my wit bleeds for't, me thinks.
13821382Cand. Then let this warning more of
sence a
fford.
13831383The name of Cozen is a bloudy word.
13841384Fnst. Ile nere call Coz agen whil
st I liue, to haue
such
13851385a coyle about it: this
should be a Coronation day; for my
13861386head runnes Claret lu
stily.
Exit. Enter an Officer. 13871387Can. Go with the Surgeon to haue great re
spe
ct.
13881388How now, my
friend, what, do they
sit to day?
13891389Off. Yes
sir, they expe
ct you at the Senate-hou
se.
13901390Can. I thāk your paines, Ile not be la
st man there.
Exit Off. 13911391My gowne,
George, goe, my gowne. A happy land,
13921392Where graue men meet each cau
se to vnder
stand,
13931393Who
se con
sciences are not cut out in brybes,
13941394To gull the poore mans right: but in euen
scales,
13951395Peize rich & poore, without corruptions veyles.
13961396Come, wheres the gowne?
Ge. I cannot
find the key
sir.
13971397Cand. Reque
st it of your mi
stris.
E 4 Wife. Come
THE HONEST WHORE.
13981398Wife. Come not to me for any key.
13991399Ile not be troubled to deliuer it.
14001400Cand. Good wife, kind wife, it is a needfull trouble,
14021402Wife. Mothes
swallow downe your gowne:
14031403you
set my teeth an edge with talking on't.
14041404Cand. Nay prythee,
sweet, I cannot meet without it,
14051405I
should haue a great
fine
set on my head.
14061406Wife. Set on your coxcomb: tu
sh,
fine me no
fines.
14071407Can. Beleeue me (
sweet) none greets the Senate-hou
se,
14081408without his Robe of reuerence, that's his Gowne.
14091409Wife. Wel, then y'are like to cro
sse that cu
stome once,
14101410You get nor key, nor gowne, and
so depart:
14111411This trick will vexe him
sure, and
fret his heart.
Exit. 14121412Cand. Stay, let me
see, I mu
st haue
some deuice,
14131413My cloke's too
short: fy, fy, no cloke will doo't:
14141414It mu
st be
something fa
shioned like a gowne,
14151415With my armes out: oh
George, come hither
George,
14161416I pry thee lend me thine aduice.
14171417Geor. Troth
sir, were it any but you, they would break (open che
st.
14181418Cand. O no, breake open che
st! thats a Theeues o
ffice:
14191419Therein you coun
sell me again
st my bloud:
14201420'Twould
shew impatience that, any meeke meanes
14211421I would be glad to imbrace. Ma
sse I haue got it:
14221422Go,
step vp, fetch me downe one of the Carpets,
14231423The
sadde
st colourd Carpet, hone
st George,
14241424Cut thou a hole ith middle for my necke,
14251425Two for mine armes, nay prithee looke not
strange.
14261426Geor. I hope you doe not thinke
sir, as you meane.
14271427Cand. Prithee about it quickly, the houre chides me:
14281428Warily George,
softly, take heed of eyes,
Exit George. 14291429Out of two euils hee's accounted wi
se,
14301430That can picke out the lea
st; the Fine impo
sde
14311431For an vn-gowned Senator, is about
14321432Forty Cruzadoes, the Carpet not 'boue foure.
14331433Thus haue I cho
sen the le
sser euill yet,
14341434Pre
seru'd my patience, foyld her de
sperate wit.
14351435Geor. Here,
sir, heer's the Carpet.
Enter George. Cand. O
THE HONEST WHORE.
14361436Cand. O well done,
George, weele cut it iu
st ith mid
st:
14371437Tis very well I thanke thee, helpe it on.
14381438Ge. It mu
st come ouer your head,
sir, like a wenches pe
-(ticoate.
14391439Cand. Th'art in the right, good
George, it mu
st indeed.
14401440Fetch me a nightcap: for Ile gyrd it clo
se,
14411441As if my health were queazy: 'twill
show well
14421442For a rude carele
sse night-gowne, wil't not think
st?
14431443Ge. Indi
fferent wel,
sir, for a night-gowne, being girt & (pleated.
14441444Cand. I, and a night-cap on my head.
14451445Ge. Thats true
sir, Ile run & fetch one, & a
sta
ffe.
Exit Ge. 14461446Cand. For thus they cannot chu
se but con
ster it,
14471447One that is out of health, takes no delight,
14481448Weares his apparell without appetite,
14491449And puts on heedles rayment without forme.
Enter Geo. 14501450So
so, kind G
eorge, be
secret now: & prithee do not laugh
14511451at me till Ime out of
sight.
Geo. I laugh? not I
sir.
14531453Methinks, Ide rather weare, without a
frowne,
14541454A patient Carpet, then an angry Gowne.
Exit. 14551455Ge. Now looks my M. iu
st like one of our carpet knights,
14561456only hee's
somwhat the hone
ster of the two.
Enter Can-didoes wife. 14581458Geo. Yes for
sooth, his backe is but new turnd.
14591459Wi. And in his cloke? did he not vexe and
sweare?
14601460Geor. No, but heele make you
sweare anon: no indeed,
14621462Wife. Key
sinke to hell:
still patient, patient
still!
14631463I am with child to vexe him: prythee G
eorge,
14641464If ere thou look
st for fauour at my hands,
14651465Vphold one Ie
st for me.
Geor. Again
st my ma
ster?
14661466Wi. Tis a meere ie
st in fayth:
say, wilt thou doo't?
14681468Wi. Heere, take this key, thou know
st where all things (lie,
14691469Put on thy ma
sters be
st apparell, Gowne,
14701470Chayne, Cap, Ru
ffe, euery thing, be like him
selfe,
14711471And 'gain
st his comming home, walke in the
shop,
14721472Fayne the
same cariage, and his patient looke,
14731473'Twill breed but a ie
st thou know
st,
speake, wilt thou?
14741474Geor. 'Twill wrong my ma
sters patience.
F Wi. Pry-
THE HONEST WHORE.
14751475Wi. Prythee
George.
Geor. Well, if youle
saue me
14761476harmle
sse, and put me vnder couert barne, I am content to
14771477plea
se you prouided it may breed no wrong again
st him.
14781478Wi. No wrong at all: here take the Key, be gone:
14791479If any vex him, this: if not this, none
Exeunt. 14821482Bawd. O R
oger, R
oger, where's your mi
stris, wher's your
14831483mi
stris? there's the
fine
st, neate
st Gentleman at my hou
se,
14841484but newly come ouer: O where is
she, where is
she, where
14861486Rog. My mi
stris is abroad, but not among
st em: my mi
- 14871487stris is not the whore now that you take her for.
14881488Baw. How? is
she not a whore? do you go about to take
14891489away her good name, R
oger? you are a
fine Pandar indeed.
14901490Rog. I tell you,
Madona Finger-locke, I am not
sad for
14911491nothing, I ha not eaten one good meale this three & thir
- 14921492ty dayes: I had wont to get
sixteene pence by fetching a
14931493pottle of Hypocras: but now tho
se dayes are pa
st: we had
14941494as good doings,
Madona Finger-locke,
she within dores and
14951495I without, as any poore yong couple in Millain.
14961496Baw. Gods my life, and is
she chang'd now?
14971497Rog. I ha lo
st by her
squeami
shne
sse, more then would
14991499 And had
she no time to turn hone
st but now? what a vile
15001500woman is this? twenty pound a night, Ile be
sworne,
Roger,
15011501in good gold and no
siluer: why here was a time, if
she
15021502should ha pickt out a time, it could not be better! gold y
- 15031503nough
stirring; choyce of men, choyce of haire, choyce of
15041504beards, choyce of legs, and choyce of euery, euery, euery
15051505thing: it cannot
sink into my head, that
she
should be
such
15061506an A
sse. R
oger, I neuer beleeue it.
15071507Rog. Here
she comes now.
Enter Bellafronte. 15081508Baw. O
sweet
Madona, on with your loo
se gowne, your
15091509felt & your feather, there's the
sweete
st, propre
st, gallante
st 15101510Gentleman at my hou
se, he
smells all of Muske & Amber
15111511greece, his pocket full of Crownes,
flame-colourd dublet,
15121512red
satin ho
se, Carnation
silk
stockins, and a leg and a
1513bo
- Bel. Hence
THE HONEST WHORE.
15141514Bel. Hence, thou our
sexes mon
ster, poy
sonous Bawd,
15151515Lu
sts Fa
ctor, and damnations Orator,
15161516Go
ssip of hell, were all the Harlots
sinnes
15171517Which the whole world conteynes, numbred together,
15181518Thine farre exceeds them all; of all the creatures
15191519That euer were created, thou art ba
se
st:
15201520What
serpent would beguile thee of thy O
ffice?
15211521It is dete
stable: for thou liu'
st 15221522Vpon the dregs of Harlots, guard'
st the dore,
15231523Whil
st couples goe to dauncing: O cour
se deuill!
15241524Thou art the ba
stards cur
se, thou brand
st his birth,
15251525The lechers French di
sea
se; for thou dry-
suck
st him:
15261526The Harlots poy
son, and thine owne confu
sion.
15271527Baw. Mary come vp with a pox, haue you no body to
15281528raile again
st, but your Bawd now?
15291529Bel. And you, Knaue Pandar, kin
sman to a Bawd.
15301530Rog. You and I
Madona, are Cozens.
15311531Bel. Of the
same bloud and making, neere allyed,
15321532Thou, that
slaue to
sixpence, ba
se-mettald villayne.
15331533Rog. Sixpence? nay that's not
so; I neuer took vnder two
15341534shillings foure pence, I hope I know my fee.
15351535Bel. I know not again
st which mo
st to inueigh:
15361536For both of you are damnd
so equally.
15371537Thou neuer
spar'
st for oathes:
swear
st any thing,
15381538As if thy
soule were made of
shoe-leather.
15391539God dam me, Gentleman, if she be within,
15401540When in the next roome
she's found dallying.
15411541Rog. If it be my vocation to
sweare, euery man in his vo
- 15421542cation: I hope my betters
sweare and dam them
selues, and
15431543why
should not I?
Bel. R
oger, you cheat kind gentlemen?
15461546Baw. And you do ca
sheere him, he
shalbe entertaynd.
15471547Rog. Shall I? then blurt a your
seruice.
15481548Bel. As hell would haue it, entertaynd by you!
15491549I dare the deuill him
selfe to match tho
se two.
Exit. 15501550Baw. Mary gup, are you growne
so holy,
so pure,
so ho
- F 2 Rog. Scur-
THE HONEST WHORE.
15521552Rog. Scuruy hone
st Punck! But
stay
Madona, how mu
st 15531553our agreement be now? for you know I am to haue all the
15541554commings in at the hall dore, & you at the chamber dore.
15551555Ba. True
Rog. except my vailes.
Rog. Vailes, what vailes?
15561556Ba. Why as thus, if a couple come in a Coach, & light to
15571557lie down a little, then
Roger, thats my fee, & you may walk
15581558abroad; for the Coach man him
selfe is their Pandar.
15591559Ro. Is a
so? in truth I haue almo
st forgot, for want of ex
- 15601560erci
se: But how if I fetch this Citizens wife to that Gull, &
15611561that
Madona to that Gallant, how then?
15621562Ba. Why then,
Roger, you are to haue
sixpence a lane,
15631563so many lanes,
so many
sixpences.
15641564Ro. I
st so? thē I
see we two
shall agree and liue together.
15651565Ba. I
Roger,
so long as there be any Tauernes and baw
- 15681568Enter Bellafronte with a Lute, pen, inke and paper 15711571 THe Courtiers flattring Iewels, 15741574 That sucke vp poore Bees Honyes: 15771577 Silks and Veluets, Pearles and Ambers, 15781578 Shall not draw me to their Chambers. Shee writes. 15801580Oh, tis in vayne to write: it will not plea
se,
15811581Inke on this paper would ha but pre
sented
15821582The foule blacke
spots that
sticke vpon my
soule,
15831583And rather make me loth
somer, then wrought
15841584My loues impre
ssion in
Hipolitoes thought.
15851585No, I mu
st turne the cha
ste leaues of my bre
st,
15861586And pick out
some
sweet meanes to breed my re
st.
15881588As true vnto thy heart, as thy heart to thee,
And
THE HONEST WHORE.
15891589And hate all men, their gifts and company.
15901590Enter Matheo, Castruchio, Fluello, Pioratto. 15911591Mat. You, goody Punck,
subandi Cockatrice, O yare a
15921592sweet whore of your promi
se, are you not think you? how
15931593wel you came to
supper to vs la
st night: mew, a whore &
15941594breake her word! nay you may blu
sh, & hold downe your
15951595head at it wel ynough: Sfoot, aske the
se gallants if we
staid
15961596not till we were as hungry as Seriants.
15981598Cast. Nay fayth
Acquaintance, let me tell you, you forgat
15991599your
selfe too much: we had excellēt cheere, rare vintage,
16011601Pior. And when wee were in our Woodcocks (
sweete
16021602Rogue) a brace of Gulles, dwelling here in the City, came
16031603in & payd all the
shot.
Mat. Pox on her, let her alone.
16041604Bel. O, I pray doe, if you be Gentlemen:
16051605I pray depart the hou
se; be
shrew the dore
16061606For being
so ea
sily entreated: fayth,
16071607I lent but little eare vnto your talke,
16081608My mind was bu
sied otherwi
se in troth,
16091609And
so your words did vnregarded pa
sse:
16101610Let this
su
ffice, I am not as I was.
16111611Flu. I am not what I was! no Ile be
sworne thou art not:
16121612for thou wert hone
st at
fiue, & now th'art a Puncke at
fif
- 16131613teene: thou wert ye
sterday a
simple whore, and now th'art
16141614a cunning Conny-catching Baggage to day.
16151615Bel. Ile
say Ime wor
se, I pray for
sake me then,
16161616I doe de
sire you leaue me, Gentlemen,
16171617And leaue your
selues: O be not what you are,
16181618(Spendthrifts of
soule and body)
16191619Let me per
swade you to for
sake all Harlots,
16201620Wor
se thē the deadlie
st poy
sons, they are wor
se:
16211621For o're their
soules hangs an eternall cur
se,
16221622In being
slaues to
slaues, their labours peri
sh,
16231623Th'are
seldome ble
st with
fruit; for ere it blo
ssoms,
16251625They haue no i
ssue but foule vgly ones,
16261626That run along with them, e'ene to their graues:
16271627For
stead of children, they breed ranke di
sea
ses,
F 3 And
THE HONEST WHORE.
16281628And all, you Gallants, can be
stow on them,
16291629Is that French Infant, which n'ere a
cts but
speaks:
16301630What
shallow
sonne & heire then, fooli
sh gallāt,
16311631Would wa
ste all his inheritance, to purcha
se
16321632A
filthy loathd di
sea
se? and pawne his body
16331633To a dry euill: that v
surie's wor
st of all,
16341634When th'intere
st will eate out the principall.
16351635Mat. Sfoot,
she guls em the be
st: this is alwaies
16361636her fa
shion, when
she would be rid of any com
- 16371637pany that
she cares not for, to inioy mine alone.
16381638Flu. Whats here? in
stru
ctions, Admonitions, and Caue
- 16391639ats? come out, you
scabberd of vengeance.
16401640Mat. Fluello,
spurne your hounds when they fy
ste, you
16411641shall not
spurne my Punk, I can tell you my bloud is vext.
16421642Flu. Pox a your bloud: make it a quarrell.
16431643Mat. Y'are a Slaue, will that
serue turne?
16451645Cast. Matheo,
Fluello, for
shame put vp.
16481648Mou'd with a little folly, haue let out
16491649Their
soules in Brothell hou
ses, fell downe and dyed
16501650Iu
st at their Harlots foot, as 'twere in pride.
16521652Mat. I, I, any where,
sauing at Church: pray take heed
16561656Pi. There's more deceit in women, then in hel.
Exeunt, 16571657Mat. Ha, ha, thou doe
st gull em
so rarely,
so naturally: if
16581658I did not think thou had
st bin in earne
st: thou art a
sweet
16601660Bel. Why are not you gone to, Signior
Matheo?
16611661I pray depart my hou
se: you may beleeue me,
16621662In troth I haue no part of Harlot in me.
16641664Bel. Indeed I loue you not: but hate you wor
se
16651665Then any man, becau
se you were the
fir
st Gaue
THE HONEST WHORE.
16661666Gaue money for my
soule; you brake the Ice,
16671667Which after turnd a puddle: I was led
16681668By your temptation to be mi
serable:
16691669I pray
seeke out
some other that will fall,
16701670Or rather (I pray)
seeke out none at all.
16711671Mat. I
st po
ssible, to be impo
ssible, an hone
st whore! I
16721672haue heard many hone
st wenches turne Strumpets with
16731673a wet
finger; but for a Harlot to turne hone
st, is one of
Her- 16741674cules labours: It was more ea
sie for him in one night to
16751675make
fifty queanes, then to make one of them hone
st a
- 16761676gen in
fifty yeeres: come, I hope thou doo
st but ie
st.
16771677Bel. Tis time to leaue o
ff ie
sting, I had almo
st 16781678Ie
sted away Saluation: I
shall loue you,
16811681Bel. Oh, tempt no more womē:
shun their weighty cur
se,
16821682Women (at be
st) are bad, make them not wor
se,
16831683You gladly
seeke our
sexes ouerthrow:
16841684But not to ray
se our
states for all your wrongs.
16851685Will you vouch
safe me but due recompence,
16871687Mat. How, marry with a Punck, a Cockatrice, a Har
- 16881688lot? mary foh, Ile be burnt thorow the no
se
fir
st.
16891689Bel. Why la? the
se are your othes you loue to vndo vs,
16901690To put heauen from vs, whil
st our be
st houres wa
ste:
16911691You loue to make vs lewd, but neuer cha
ste.
16921692Mat. Ile heare no more of this: this ground vpon,
16931693Th'art damn'd for altring thy Religion.
Exit. 16941694Bel. Thy lu
st and
sin
speake
so much: go thou my ruine,
16951695The
fir
st fall my
soule tooke; by my example
16961696I hope few maydens now will put their heads
16971697Vnder mens girdels: who lea
st tru
sts, is mo
st wi
se:
16981698Mens othes do ca
st a mi
st before our eyes.
16991699My be
st of wit be ready: now I goe,
17001700By
some deuice to greet
Hipolito.
F 4 SCENA
THE HONEST WHORE.
17021702Enter a seruant setting out a Table, on which he places 17031703a scull, a picture, a booke and a Taper. 17041704Ser. So, this is Monday morning, and now mu
st I to my
17051705hu
swi
fry: would I had bin created a Shoomaker; for all the
17061706gentle craft are gentlemen euery Monday by their Copy,
17071707&
scorne (then) to worke one true
stitch. My M. meanes
17081708sure to turne me into a
student; for here's my booke, here
17091709my deske, here my light; this my clo
se chamber, and heere
17101710my Punck:
so that this dull drowzy
fir
st day of the weeke,
17111711makes me halfe a Prie
st, halfe a Chandler, halfe a paynter,
17121712halfe a Sexton, I & halfe a Bawd: for (all this day) my o
ffice
17131713is to do nothing but keep the dore. To proue it, looke you,
17141714this good-face & yonder gentleman (
so
soone as euer my
17151715back's turnd) wil be naught together.
Enter Hipolito. 17161716Hip. Are all the windowes
shut?
Ser. Clo
se
sir, as the
fist 17171717of a Courtier that hath
stood in three raignes.
17181718Hip. Thou art a faythfull
seruant, and ob
seru'
st 17191719The Calender, both of my
solemne vowes,
17201720And ceremonious
sorrow: Get thee gone,
17211721I charge thee on thy life, let not the
sound
17221722Of any womans voyce pierce through that dore.
17231723Ser. If they do, my Lord, Ile pearce
some of them.
17241724What will your Lord
ship haue to breakfa
st?
17251725Hip. Sighs.
Ser. What to dinner?
Hip. Teares.
17261726Ser. The one of them, my Lord, will
fill you too full of
17271727wind, the other wet you too much. What to
supper?
17281728Hip. That which (now) thou can
st not get me, the con
- 17301730Ser. Indeed thats harder to come by then euer was
17331733Ser. Ile make away my
selfe pre
sently, which few Ser
- 17341734uants will doe for their Lords; but rather helpe to make
17351735them away: Now to my dore-keeping, I hope to picke
17371737Hip. My Infelices face: her brow, her eye,
17381738The dimple on her cheeke: and
such
sweet skill,
Hath
THE HONEST WHORE.
17391739Hath
from the cunning workemans pencill
flowne,
17401740The
se lippes looke
fre
sh and liuely as her owne,
17411741Seeming to mooue and
speake. Las! now I
see,
17421742The rea
son why fond women loue to buy
17431743Adulterate complexion
: here 'tis read,
17441744Fal
se coulours la
st after the true be dead.
17451745Of all the Ro
ses grafted on her cheekes,
17461746Of all the graces dauncing in her eyes,
17471747Of all the Mu
sick
set vpon her tongue,
17481748Of all that was pa
st womans excellence,
17491749In her white bo
some, looke! a painted board,
17501750Circum
scribes all: Earth can no bli
sse a
ffoord.
17511751Nothing of her, but this
? this cannot
speake,
17521752It has no lap for me to re
st vpon,
17531753No lip worth ta
sting: here the wormes will feed,
17541754As in her co
ffin: hence then idle Art,
17551755True loue's be
st pi
cturde in a true-loues heart.
17561756Here art thou drawne
sweet maid, till this be dead,
17571757So that thou liu'
st twice, twice art buried.
17581758Thou
figure of my
friend, lye there. Whats here?
17591759Perhaps this
shrewd pate was mine enimies:
17601760Las!
say it were
: I need not feare him now:
17611761For all his braues, his contumelious breath,
17621762His
frownes (tho dagger-pointed) all his plot,
17631763(Tho 'nere
so mi
schieuous) his Italian pilles,
17641764His quarrels, and (that common fence) his law,
17651765See,
see, they're all eaten out; here's not left one
? 17661766How cleane they're pickt away! to the bare bone!
17671767How mad are mortals then to reare great names
17681768On tops of
swelling hou
ses? or to weare out
17691769Their
fingers ends (in durt,) to
scrape vp gould!
17701770Not caring
so (that Sumpter-hor
se) the back
17711771Be hung with gawdy trappings, with what cour
se,
17721772Yea rags mo
st beggerly, they cloath the
soule:
17731773Yet (after all) their
Gay-nes lookes thus foule.
17741774What fooles are men to build a gari
sh tombe,
17751775Onely to
saue the carca
sse whil
st it rots,
17761776To maintein't long in
stincking, make good carion,
G But
THE HONEST WHORE.
17771777But leaue no good deeds to pre
serue them
sound,
17781778For good deedes keepe men
sweet, long aboue ground,
17791779And mu
st all come to this; fooles; wi
se, all hether,
17801780Mu
st all heads thus at la
st be laid together:
17811781Draw me my pi
cture then, thou graue neate workeman,
17821782After this fa
shion, not like this; the
se coulours
17831783In time ki
ssing but ayre, will be ki
st o
ff,
17841784But heres a fellow; that which he layes on,
17851785Till doomes day, alters not complexion.
17861786Deaths' the be
st Painter then
: They that draw
shapes,
17871787And liue by wicked faces, are but Gods Apes,
17881788They come but neere the life, and there they
stay,
17891789This fellow drawes life to: his Art is fuller,
17901790The pi
ctures which he makes are without coulour.
17921792Ser. Heres a per
son would
speake with you Sir.
17941794Ser. A par
son
sir would
speake with you.
17961796Ser. Vicar? no
sir, has too good a face to be a Vicar yet, a
17981798Hip. What youth
? of man or woman? lock the dores.
17991799Ser. If it be a woman, mary-bones and Potato pies keepe
18001800me for medling with her, for the thing has got the breeches,
18011801tis a male-varlet
sure my Lord, for a womans tayler nere
18031803Hip. Let him giue thee his me
ssage and be gone.
18041804Ser. He
sayes hees
signior
Mathaeos man, but I know he
18071807Ser. Cau
se has nere a beard: tis his boy I thinke
sir, who
- 18091809Hip. Send him and keepe the doore.
Reades. 18131813Ide
saile were I to choo
se, not in the Ocean,
Cedars
THE HONEST WHORE.
18141814Cedars are
shaken, when
shrubs doe feele no bruize.
18191819Bell. Not all in health my Lord.
18221822Hard fate when women are compeld to wooe.
18231823Hip. This paper does
speake nothing.
18251825Matter of life it
speakes, and therefore writ
18261826In hidden Cara
cter; to me iu
stru
ction
18271827My mai
ster giues, And (le
sse you plea
se to
stay
18281828Till you both meet) I can the text di
splay.
18311831Looke on my face, and read the
strange
st story!
18321832Hip. What villaine, ho?
Enter his seruant. 18341834Hip. Thou
slaue, thou ha
st let in the diuell.
18351835Ser. Lord ble
sse vs, where? hees not clouen my Lord that
18361836I can
see
: be
sides the diuell goes more like a Gentleman
18371837than a Page: good my Lord
Boon couragio.
18381838Hip. Thou ha
st let in a woman, in mans
shape.
18401840Ser. Not dambd I hope for putting in a woman to a Lord.
18411841Hip. Fetch me my Rapier,--do not: I
shall kill thee.
18421842Purge this infe
cted chamber of that plague,
18431843That runnes vpon me thus
: Slaue, thru
st her hence.
18441844Ser. Alas my Lord, I
shall neuer be able to thru
st her hence
18451845without helpe
: come Mermaid you mu
st to Sea agen.
18461846Bell. Here me but
speake, my words
shall be all Mu
sick:
18501850Ser. Why then hell's broke loo
se.
Exit. 18511851Hip. Hence, guard the chamber
: let no more come on,
G 2 One
THE HONEST WHORE.
18521852One woman
serues for mans damnation.
18531853Be
shrew thee, thou doo
st make me violate,
18541854The cha
ste
st and mo
st san
ctimonious vow,
18551855That ere was entred in the court of heauen:
18561856I was on meditations
spottles wings,
18571857vpon my iorney thether; like a
storme
18581858Thou beats my ripened cogitations,
18591859flat to the ground: and like a theife doo
st stand,
18601860To
steale deuotion
from the holy land.
18611861Bel. If woman were thy mother; if thy hart,
18621862Bee not all Marble, (or ift Marble be)
18631863Let my teares
soften it, to pitty me,
18641864I doe be
seech the doe not thus with
scorne,
18671867Get thee
some other
suite, this
fits thee not,
18681868I would not grant it to a kneeling Queene,
18691869I cannot loue thee, nor I mu
st not: See,
18711871Where my
soule's bound in heauy penalties.
18721872Bel. She's dead you told me,
shele let fal her
suite.
18731873Hip. My vowes to her,
fled after her to heauen,
18741874Were thine eyes cleere as mine, thou might
st behold her,
18751875Watching vpon yon battlements of
starres,
18761876How I ob
serue them:
should I breake my bond,
18771877This bord would riue in twaine, the
se wooden lippes
18781878Call me mo
st periurde villaine, let it
su
ffice,
18791879I ha
set thee in the path; I
st not a
signe,
18801880I loue thee, when with one
so mo
st mo
st deare,
18811881Ile haue thee fellowes? All are fellowes there.
18821882Bel. Be greater then a king,
saue not a body,
18831883But from eternall
shipwracke keepe a
soule,
18841884If not, and that againe,
sinnes path I tread,
18851885The griefe be mine, the guilt fall on thy head.
18861886Hip. Stay and take Phi
sicke for it, read this booke,
18871887Aske coun
sell of this head whats to be done,
18881888Hele
strike it dead that tis damnation,
18891889If you turne turke againe, oh doe it not,
The
THE HONEST WHORE.
18901890The heauen cannot allure you to doe well
18911891From doing ill let hell
fright you: and learne this,
18921892The
soule who
se bo
some lu
st did neuer touch,
18931893Is Gods faire bride, and maidens
soules are
such:
18941894The
soule that leauing cha
stities white
shore,
18951895Swims in hot
sen
suall
streames, is the diuels whore,
18961896How now: who comes.
Enter his seruant. 18971897Ser. No more knaues my Lord that weare
smocks: heres
18981898a letter
from do
ctor
Benedict; I would not enter his man, tho
18991899he had haires at his mouth, for feare he
should be a woman, for
19001900some women haue beardes, mary they are halfe witches,
19011901Slid you are a
sweete youth to weare a codpeece, and haue no
19031903Hip. Ile meete the do
ctor, tell him, yet to night
19041904I cannot: but at morrow ri
sing Sunne
19051905I will not faile: go
: woman fare thee well.
Exeunt. 19061906Bel. The lowe
st fall can be but into hell,
19071907It does not moue him. I mu
st therefore
fly,
19081908From this vndoing Cittie, and with teares,
19091909Wa
sh o
ff all anger
from my fathers brow,
19101910He cannot
sure but ioy
seeing me new borne,
19111911A woman hone
st fir
st and then turne whore,
19121912Is (as with me) common to thou
sands more,
19131913But
from a
strumpet to turne cha
st: that
sound,
19141914Has oft bin heard, that woman hardly found.
Exit. 1915191511. SCE. Enter Fustigo, Crambo and Poli. 19161916Fus. Hold vp your hands gentlemen: heres one, two, three,
19171917(nay I warrant they are
sound pi
stols, and without
flawes, I
19181918had them (of my
sister, and I know
she v
ses to put nothing
19191919thats crackt,) three, foure,
fiue,
sixe,
seuen, eight and nine, by
19201920this hand bring me but a piece of his bloud. and you
shall
19211921haue 9. more. Ile lurke in a tauerne not far o
ff, & prouide
sup
- 19221922per to clo
se vp the end of the Tragedy, the linnen drapers re
- 19231923mēber-
stand toot I be
seech you, & play your partes perfe
ctly.
19241924Cram. Looke you Signior, tis not your golde that we way.
19251925Fust. Nay, nay, way it and
spare not, if it lacke one graine of (corne;
19261926Ile giue you a bu
shell of wheate to make it vp.
19271927Cram. But by your fauour Signior, which of the
seruants
G 3 is
THE HONEST WHORE.
19281928is it, becau
se wele puni
sh iu
stly.
19291929Fust. Mary tis the head man; you
shall ta
st him by his
19301930tongue a pretty tall prating felow, with a
Tuscalonian beard.
19321932Fust. Cods life I was neere
so thrumbd
since I was a gentle
- 19331933man: my coxcombe was dry beaten as if my haire had beene
19341934hemp.
Cram. Wele dry beate
some of them.
19351935Fust. Nay it grew
so high, that my
sister cryed murder out
19361936very manfully: I haue her con
sent in a manner to haue him
19371937pepperd, els ile not doot to win more then ten cheaters do at a
19381938ri
fling: breake but his pate or
so, onely his mazer, becau
se
19391939ile haue his head in a cloath a
swell as mine, hees a linnen dra
- 19401940per and may take enough. I could enter mine a
ction of batte
- 19411941ry again
st him, but we may haps be both dead and rotten be
- 19431943Cram. No more to doe, but in
sconce your
selfe i'th taueren;
19441944prouide no great cheare, couple of Capons,
some Phe
sants,
19451945Plouers, an Oringeado-pie or
so: but how bloudy
soere the
19471947Fust. No, no, nay if I
stir,
some body
shal
stinke: ile not budge:
19491949Cram. Well, well, to the tauerne, let not our
supper be raw,
19501950for you
shall haue blood enough-your belly full.
19511951Fust. Thats all
so god
sa me, I thir
st after, bloud for bloud,
19521952bump for bump, no
se for no
se, head for head, pla
ster for pla
- 19531953ster, and
so farewell: what
shall I call your names becau
se ile
19541954leaue word, if any
such come to the barre.
19551955Cram. My name is Corporall
Crambo.
19561956Poh. and mine, Lieutenant
Poh.
Exeunt. 19571957Cram. Poli. Is as tall a man as euer opened Oy
ster: I would
19581958not be the diuell to meete
Poh, farewell.
19591959Fust. Nor I by this light, if
Poh be
such a
Poh.
Exeunt. 19601960Enter Condidoes wife, in her shop, and the Wife.
THE HONEST WHORE.
19651965The Senate will leaue wording pre
sently:
196719672. Pre. Yes for
sooth, hees furbu
sht.
19681968Wife. Now as you euer hope to win my fauour,
19691969Throw both your duties and re
spe
cts on him,
19701970With the like awe as if he were your mai
ster,
19711971Let not your lookes betray it with a
smile,
19721972Or ieering glaunce to any cu
stomer,
19731973Keepe a true Setled countenance, and beware,
19741974You laugh not what
soeuer you heare or
see.
197519752. Pren. I warrant you mi
stris, let vs alone for keeping our
19761976countenance: for if I li
st, theres neuer a foole in all
Myllan shal
19771977make me laugh, let him play the foole neuer
so like an A
sse,
19781978whether it be the fat Court foole, or the leane Cittie foole.
19791979Wife. enough then, call downe
George.
19821982Wife. Be redy with your legs then let me
see,
19831983How curtzy would become him: gallantly!
19841984Be
shrew my bloud a proper
seemely man,
19851985Of a choice carriage walkes with a good port,
19861986Geo. I thanke you mi
stris, my back's broad enough, now
19881988Wif Sure I
should thinke it were the lea
st of
sin,
19891989To mi
stake the mai
ster, and to let him in.
19901990Geo. Twere a good Comedy of errors that yfaith.
199119912. Pre. whi
st, whi
st, my mai
ster.
19921992Enter Candido, and Exit presently. 19931993Wif. You all know your taskes: gods my life, whats that
19941994hee has got vpon's backe? who can tell?
19951995Geo. That can I, but I will not.
19961996Wife. Girt about him like a mad-man: what: has he
1997lo
st 1997his cloake too: this is the madde
st fa
shion that ere I
19991998What
said he
George when he pa
sde by thee?
G 4 Geor.
THE HONEST WHORE.
20001999Geo. Troth Mi
stris nothing: not
so much as a Bee, he did
20012000not hum
: not
so much as a bawd he did not hem
: not
so
20022001much as a Cuekold he did not ha
: neither hum, hem, nor ha,
20032002onely
starde me in the face, pa
st along, and made ha
st in, as if
20042003my lookes had workt with him, to giue him a
stoole.
20052004Wi. Sure hees vext now, this trick has mou'd his Spleene,
20062005Hees angred now, becau
se he vttred nothing
: 20072006And wordle
sse wrath breakes out more violent,
20082007May be heele
striue for place, when he comes downe,
20092008But if thou lou'
st me
George, a
ffoord him none.
20102009Geo. Nay let me alone to play my mai
sters prize, as long as
20112010my Mi
stri
sse warrants me
: Ime
sure I haue his be
st clothes
20122011on, and I
scorne to giue place to any that is inferiour in appa
- 20132012rell to me, thats an Axiom, a principle, & is ob
seru'd as much
20142013as the fa
shion; let that per
swade you then, that Ile
shoulder
20152014with him for the vpper hand in the
shop, as long as this
20172016Wi. Spoke with the
spirit of a Mai
ster, tho with the
20202019Why how now mad-man
? what in your trick
sicoates!
20232022See what you lack, what i
st you buy
? pure Callicoes,
fine
20242023Hollands, choi
se Cambrickes, neate Lawnes
: see what you
20252024buy? pray come neere, my Mai
ster will v
se you well, hee can
20272026Wi. I that he can, out of a whole peece of Lawne yfaith.
20282027Cand. Pray
see your choi
se here Gentlemen.
20292028Wi. O
fine foole
? what a mad-man? a patient mad-man
? 20302029who euer heard of the like
? well
sir Ile
fit you and your hu
- 20312030mour pre
sently
: what? cro
sse-points, Ile vntie em all in a trice,
20322031Ile vex you faith
: Boy take your cloake, quick, come.
Exit. 20332032Cand.Be couered
George, this chaine, and welted gowne,
20342033Bare to this coate
: then the worlds vp
side downe.
20362035Cram. Thats the
shop, and theres the fellow.
20372036Poli. I but the Mai
ster is walking in there.
Cram.
THE HONEST WHORE.
20392038Poh. Sbloud doe
st long to lye in Limbo?
20402039Cram. And Limbo be in hell, I care not.
20412040Cand. Looke you Gentlemen, your choi
se: Cambricks?
20442043Cram. Haue you none of this
strip'd Canuas for doublets.
20452044Cand. None
strip'd
sir, but plaine.
204620452. Pren. I thinke there be one peece
strip'd within.
20472046Geo. Step
sirra and fetch it, hum, hum hum.
20482047Cand. Looke you Gentlemen, Ile make but one
spred
- 20492048ding, heres a peece of cloth,
fine, yet
shall weare like Yron, tis
20502049without fault, take this vpon my word, tis without fault.
20512050Cram. Then tis better than you
sirra.
20522051Cand. I, and a number more, ô that each
soule
20532052Were but as
spotle
sse as this Innocent white,
20552054Cram. Twould haue
some then: there was a
fray here la
st 20572056Cand. There was indeed a little
flea-biting.
20582057Poh. A Gentleman had his pate broake, call you that but
20612060Cram. Zownes doe you
stand in't
? He strikes him. 20622061Geo. Sfoot clubs, clubs, prentices, downe with em, ah you
20632062roagues,
strike a Citizen in's
shop.
20642063Cand. None of you
stir I pray, forbeare good
George.
20652064Cram. I be
seech you
sir, we mi
stooke our markes, deliuer
20672066Geo. Your head bleeds
sir, cry clubs.
20682067Cand. I
say you
shall not, pray be patient,
20692068Giue them their weapons,
sirs you're be
st be gone,
20702069I tell you here are boyes more tough then Beares
: 20712070Hence, lea
st more
fists do walke about your eares.
20722071Both. We thanke you
sir.
Exeunt, 20742073Let them alone pray, this did me no harme,
20752074Troth I was cold, and the blow made me warme,
H I thanke
THE HONEST WHORE.
20762075I thanke em for't
: be
sides I had decreed
20772076To haue a vaine prickt, I did meane to bleede,
20782077So that theres mony
sau'd
: they are hone
st men,
20792078Pray v
se em well, when they appeare agen.
20802079Geo. Yes
sir, weele v
se em like hone
st men.
20812080Cand. I well
said
George, like hone
st men, tho they be ar
- 20822081rant knaues, for thats the prai
se of the citty; helpe to lay vp
20872086Wif. I, I, mad, mad, pray take heed.
20882087Cand. How now? what newes with them? what make they
20892088with my wife
? o
fficers is
she attachd? looke to your wares.
20902089Wif. He talkes to him
selfe, oh hees much gone indeed.
20912090Off. Pray pluck vp a good heart, be not
so fearfull,
20922091Sirs hearke, weele gather to him by degrees.
20932092Wi. I, I, by degrees I pray: oh me! what makes he with
20942093the Lawne in his hand, heele teare all the ware in my
shop.
20952094Off. Feare not weele catch him on a
sudden.
20962095Wi. O you had need do
so, pray take heed of your warrant
20972096Off. I warrant mi
stris.-- Now Signior
Candido? 20982097Cand. Now
sir, what newes with you
sir?
20992098Wi. What newes with you he
sayes: oh hees far gon.
21002099Off. I pray feare nothing, lets alone with him,
21012100Signior, you looke not like your
selfe me thinkes,
21022101(Steale you a tother
side) y'are changde, y'are altred.
21032102Cand. Changde
sir, why true
sir, is change
strange, tis not
21042103the fa
shion vnle
sse it alter: Monarkes turne to beggers; beg
- 21052104gers creepe into the ne
sts of Princes, Mai
sters
serue their
21062105prenti
ses: Ladies their Seruingmen, men turne to women.
21082107Cand. I, and women turne to men, you
say true, ha ha, a
21112110Cand. Caught me
: well, well: you haue caught: me.
Geo
THE HONEST WHORE.
21132112Geo. A re
scue Prenti
ses, my mai
ster's catch-pold.
21142113Off. I charge you keepe the peace, or haue your legs gar
- 21152114tered with Yrons, we haue
from the Duke a warrant
strong
21172116Cand. I pray re
st quiet, I de
sire no re
scue.
21182117Wi. La: he de
sires no re
scue, las poore heart,
21222121Pray make
sure worke, double the cord.
21242123Wi. Looke how his head goes!
should he get but loo
se,
21252124Oh twere as much as all our liues were worth.
21262125Off. Feare not, weele make all
sure for our owne
safetie.
21272126Cand. Are you at lei
sure now? well, whats the matter
? 21282127Why do I enter into bonds thus? ha?
21292128Off. Becau
se y'are mad, put feare vpon your wife.
21302129Wi. Oh I, I went in danger of my life, euery minute.
21312130Cand. What? am I mad
say you, and I not know it?
21322131Off. That proues you mad, becau
se you know it not.
21332132Wi. Pray talke as little to him as you can,
21362135A Ci
sters thred yfaith had beene enough,
21372136To lead me any where
: Wife do you long?
21382137You are mad too, or els you do me wrong.
21392138Geo. But are you mad indeed Mai
ster?
21412140And what
she
sayes;
George, is all trueth you know:
21422141And whether now? to
Bethlem Monastery?--ha! whether?
21432142Off. Faith eene to the mad-mens pound.
21442143Cand. A Gods name,
still I feele my patience
sound.
Exe. 21452144Geo. Come weele
see whether he goes, if the mai
ster be
21462145mad, we are his
seruants, and mu
st follow his
steps, weele
21472146be mad caps too; Farewell mi
stri
sse, you
shall haue vs all in
21492148Wi. I thinke, I ha
fitted now, you and your clothes,
21502149If this moue not his patience, nothing can,
H 2 Ile
THE HONEST WHORE.
21512150Ile
sweare then I haue a
saint, and not a man
Exit. 21532152Enter Duke: Doctor: Fluello, Castruchio, Pioratto. 21542153Duk. giue vs a little leaue. Do
ctor your newes.
21552154Doc. I
sent for him my Lord: at la
st he came,
21562155And did receiue all
speech that went
from me,
21572156As gilded pilles made to prolong his health:
21582157My credit with him wrought it: for,
some men.
21592158Swallow euen empty hookes, like fooles. that feare
21602159No drowning where tis deepe
st, Cau
se tis cleare
: 21612160In th'end we
sat and eate: a health I dranke
21622161To
Infaelices sweete departed
soule,
21632162(This traine I knew would take.
) 21652164Doc. He fell with
such deuotion on his knees,
21682167Doc. That had he beene in
flam'd with zeale of prayer,
21692168He could not power't out with more reuerence.
21702169About my necke he hung, wept on my cheeke,
21712170Ki
st it, and
swore, he would adore my lippes,
21722171Becau
se they brought forth
Infaelices name.
21742173Doc. The cup he lifs vp high, and thus he
said,
21752174Here noble maid: drinkes, and was poi
soned.
21792178Ha
st peied mine aged houres out with more yeares,
21802179Than thou ha
st taken
from
Hipolito,
21812180A noble youth he was, but le
sser branches
21822181Hindring the greaters growth, mu
st be lopt o
ff,
21832182And feede the
fire: Do
ctor w'are now all thine,
Doc. I
THE HONEST WHGRE.
21882187Doc. I doe be
seech your grace to bury deepe,
21912190Do
ctor looke you toot
: me it
shall not moue,
21922191Thei'r cur
st that ill doe, not that ill do loue,
21932192Doc. You throw an angry forehead on my face,
21942193But be you pleas'd, backward thus for to looke,
21952194That for your good, this euill I vndertooke,
21992198Doc. Nor let it
stand again
st me as a bar,
22002199To thru
st me
from your pre
sence: nor beleeue
22012200(As Princes haue quicke thoughts,) that now my
finger
22022201Being deept in blood, I will not
spare the hand,
22032202But that for gold (as what can golde not doe?)
22042203I may be hi'rde to worke the like on you,
22072206Duk. No matter Do
ctor, cau
se ile feareles
sleepe,
22082207And that you
shall
stand cleare of that
su
spition
22092208I bani
sh thee for euer
from my court.
22102209This principle is olde but true as fate,
22112210Kings may loue trea
son, but the traitor hate,
Exit. 22122211Doc. I
st so: nay then Duke, your
stale principle
22132212With one as
stale, the Do
ctor thus
shall quit,
22142213He fals him
selfe that digs anothers pit,
22152214How now: where is he? will he meete me:
22172216Doc. man, meete you
sir, he might haue met with three
22182217fencers in this time and haue receiued le
sse hurt then by mee
- 22192218ting one Do
ctor of Phi
sicke: why
sir has walkt vnder the olde
22202219Abbey wall yonder this houre, till hees more colde then a
22212220Cittizens country hou
se in Ianiuere, you may
smell him be
- 22222221hinde
sir; la you: yonder he comes.
22242223Doc. man. Itch lurch if you will.
Exit. H 3 Hip. Few
THE HONEST WHORE.
22272226Could haue inticd me thus, to tru
st the Aire,
22282227With my clo
se
sighes, you
send for me: what newes
? 22292228Doc. Come you mu
st do
ff this blacke: die that pale cheeke,
22302229Into his owne colour; goe
: Attire your
selfe
22312230Fre
sh as a bridegroome, when he meetes his bride,
22322231The Duke has done much trea
son to thy loue,
22332232Tis now reuealed, tis now to be reuengde,
22342233Be mery honord
friend, thy Lady liues.
22372236Reuiude: alacke! death neuer had the hart,
22402239Phi
sicke prolongs life, when it cannot
saue,
22412240This helpes not my hopes. mine are in their graue:
22442243Which I haue euer borne you, what I
speake
22452244Is trueth: the maiden liues: that funerall,
22462245Dukes teares, the morning, was all counterfet,
22472246A
sleepy draught cozend the world and you,
22482247I was his mini
ster and then chambred vp,
22512250Doc. He cannot hope
so certainely for bli
sse:
22522251As he beleeues that I haue poy
sond you,
22532252He wode me toot, I yeelded, and con
firm'd him,
22562255Doc. Her did he clo
sely coach to
Bergamo,
22582257Hip. Will I ride,
stood
Bergamo,
22592258In the low countries of blacke hell, ile to her.
22602259Doc. You
shall to her, but not to
Bergamo,
22612260How pa
ssion makes you
fly beyond your
selfe.
22622261Much of that weary iourney I'ha cut o
ff,
22632262For
she by letters hath intelligence,
Of
THE HONEST WHORE.
22642263Of your
suppo
sed death, her owne interment,
22652264And all tho
se plots, which that fal
se Duke, (her father)
22662265Has wrought again
st you
: And
sheele meete you.
22682267Doc. Nay
see: how couetous are your de
sires,
22712270Doc. At
Bethlem mona
sterie: are you plea
sd now
? 22722271Hip, At
Bethlem mona
sterie: the place well
fits,
22732272It is the
scoole where tho
se that loo
se their wits,
22742273Pra
cti
se againe to get them: I am
sicke
22752274Of that di
sea
se, all loue is lunaticke.
22762275Doc. Weele
steale away, this night in
some di
sgui
se,
22772276Father
Anselmo, a mo
st reuerend Frier,
22782277Expe
cts our comming, before whom weele lay,
22792278Rea
sons
so
strong, that he
shall yeeld, in bonds,
22802279Oh holy wedlocke, to tie both your hands.
22822281That to beleeue it. tis impo
ssible.
22832282Doc. Let all your ioyes then die in misbeliefe,
22862285I am
so well acquainted with de
spaire,
22872286I know not how to hope: I beleeue all.
22882287Doc. Weele hence this night, much mu
st be done, much (
said
22892288But if the Do
ctor faile not in his charmes,
22902289Your Lady
shall ere morning
fill the
se armes.
22912290Hip. heauenly Phi
sition: far thy fame
shall
sprede,
22922291That mak'
st two louers
speake when they be dead.
22942293Candido's wife, and George: Pioratto 22962295Wi. O watch good
George, watch which way the Duke (comes.
22972296Geo. Here comes one of the butter
flies, aske him.
22982297Wi. Pray
sir, comes the duke this way.
22992298Pio. He's vpon comming mi
stris.
Exit. 23002299Wi. I thanke you
sir:
Geroge are there many madfolkes,
H 4 Geor
THE HONEST WHORE.
23022301Geo. O yes, of all countries
some, but e
specially mad greekes
23032302they
swarme: troth mi
stris, the world is altered with you,
23042303you had not wont to
stand thus with a paper humblie com
- 23052304plaining: but you're well enough
seru'd: prouander prickt
23062305you, as it does many of our Cittie-wiues be
sides.
23072306Wif. Doe
st thinke
George we
shall get him forth.
23082307Ge. Truly mi
stris I cannot tel, I thinke youle hardly get him
23092308forth: why tis
strange! Sfoot I haue known many womē that
23102309haue had mad ra
scals to their husbāds, whom they would be
- 23112310labour by all meanes po
ssible to keepe em in their right wits,
23122311but of a woman to long to turne a tame mā into a madman,
23132312why the diuell him
selfe was neuer v
sde
so by his dam.
23142313Wif. How does he talke
George! ha! good
George tell me.
23172316Geo. A
fraid! you had more need be a
shamd: he may ra
- 23192318Wif. But
George hees not
starke mad, is hee? hee does not
23202319raue, hees not horne-mad
George is he
? 23212320Geo. Nay I know not that, but he talkes like a Iu
stice of
23222321peace, of a thou
sand matters and to no purpo
se.
23232322Wif. Ile to the mona
stery: I
shall be mad till I inioy him,
23242323I
shalbe
sick till I
see him, yet when I doe
see him, I
shall
23262325Geo. I, ide faine
see a woman weepe out her eyes
; thats as
23272326true, as to
say, a mans cloake burnes; when it hangs in the
23282327water: I know youle weepe mi
stri
sse, but what
saies the pain
- 23292328ted cloth.
Trust not a woman when she cryes, 23302329 For sheele pump water from her eyes, 23312330 With a wet finger, and in faster showers, 23322331 Then Aprill when he raines downe flowers. 23332332Wif. I but
George, that painted cloath is worthy to be
23342333hangd vp for lying, all women haue not teares at will, vnle
sse
23362335Geo. I but mi
stri
sse how ea
sily will they
find a cau
se, and
2336as
2337one of our Chee
se-trenchers
sayes very learnedly:
23382337 As out of Wormwood Bees suck Hony, 23392338 As from poore clients Lawyers firke mony, As
THE HONEST WHORE.
23402339 As Parsley from a roasted cunny. 23412340 So tho the day be nere so sunny, 23422341 If wiues will haue it raine, downe then it driues, 23432342 The calmest husbands make the stormest wiues, 23442343Wif. Tame
George, but I ha don
storming now.
23452344Geo. Why thats well done, good mi
stris throw a
side this
23462345fa
shion of your humor, be not
so phanta
sticall in wearing it,
23472346storme no more, long no more.--This longing has made you
23482347come
short of many a good thing that you might haue had
23492348from my Mai
ster: Here comes the Duke.
23502349Enter Duke, Fluello, Pioratto, Sinere. 23512350Wife. Oh I be
seech you pardon my o
ffence,
23522351In that I dur
st abu
se your Graces warrant,
23532352Deliuer foorth my husband good my Lord.
23552354Flu. Candido my Lord,
Duke. Where is he?
23572356He was a man made vp without a gall,
23582357Nothing could moue him, nothing could conuert
23592358His meeke bloud into fury, yet like a mon
ster,
23602359I often beate at the mo
st con
stant rock
23612360Of his vn
shaken patience, and did long
23642363Had warrant
from your Grace, to cary him
23652364To
Bethlem Monastery, whence they will not
free him,
23662365Without your Graces hand that
sent him in.
23672366Duke. You haue longd fayre; tis you are mad I feare,
23682367Its
fit to fetch him thence, and keepe you there
: 23692368If he be mad, why would you haue him forth
? 23702369Geo. And plea
se your grace, hees not
starke mad, but one
- 23712370ly talkes like a young Gentleman,
somewhat phanta
stically,
23722371thats all: theres a thou
sand about your court, citty and
23742373Duk. Prouide a warrant, you
shall haue our hand.
23752374Geo. Heres a warrant ready drawne my Lord.
23762375Cast. Get pen & Inck, get pen & inck:
Enter Castruchio. I Cast.
THE HONEST WHORE.
23792378Cast. I haue
strange newes my Lord.
23812380Cast. Of
Infaelice, and a mariage.
23832382Cast. Hipolito. Geo. Here my Lord.
23842383Du. Hence with that woman, voyd the roome.
23862385Geo. Whoop, come mi
stris the Duke's mad too.
Exeunt. 23872386Du. Who told me that
Hipolito was dead?
23882387Cast. He that can make any man dead, the Do
ctor: but
23892388my Lord, hees as full of life as wilde-
fire, and as quick:
Hipo- 23902389lito, the Do
ctor, and one more rid hence this euening; the
23912390Inne at which they light is
Bethlem Monastarie: Infaeliche 23922391comes
from
Bergamo, and meetes them there
: Hipolito is
23932392mad, for he meanes this day to be maryed, the after-noone is
23942393the houre, and Frier
Anselmo is the knitter.
23952394Du. From
Bergamo? i
st po
ssible? it cannot be,
23972396Cast. I will not
sweare my Lord,
23982397But this intelligence I tooke
from one,
23992398Who
se braines workes in the plot.
24012400Flu. Mathaeo knowes all.
Pio. Hees
Hipolitoes bo
some.
24022401Duke. How farre
stands
Bethlem hence?
24042403Duke. I
st euen
so, not maried till the afternoone you
say
? 24052404Stay,
stay, lets worke out
some preuention: how:
24062405This is mo
st strange, can none but mad-men
serue
24072406To dre
sse their wedding dinner? All of you,
24082407Get pre
sently to hor
se; di
sgui
se your
selues
24102409Or riding cittizens, or
so: and take
24112410Each man a
seuerall path, but let vs meete,
24122411At
Bethlem Monasterie,
some
space of time
24132412Being
spent betweene the arriuall each of other,
24142413As if we came to
see the Lunaticks.
24152414To hor
se, away, be
secret on your liues,
24162415Loue mu
st be puni
sht that vniu
stly thriues.
Exeunt. 24172416Flu. Be
secret on your liues!
Castruchio Y'are
THE HONEST WHORE.
24182417Y'are but a
scuruy Spaniell; hone
st Lord,
24192418Good Lady: Zounds their loue is iu
st, tis good,
24202419And Ile preuent you, tho I
swim in bloud.
Exit. 24212420Enter Frier Anselmo, Hipolito, Mathaeo, Infaeliche. 24222421Hip. Nay, nay, re
solue good father, or deny.
24232422Ans. You pre
sse me to an a
ct, both full of danger,
24242423And full of happine
sse, for I behold.
24252424Your fathers
frownes, his threats, nay perhaps death,
24262425To him that dare doe this, yet noble Lord,
24272426Such comfortable beames breake through the
se clowdes,
24282427By this ble
st mariage, that your honord word
24292428Being pawnd in my defence) I will tie fa
st,
24302429The holy wedding Knot.
Hip. Tu
sh feare not the Duke.
24312430Ans. O
sonne, wi
sely to feare: Is to be
free
from feare.
24322431Hip. You haue our words, and you
shall haue our liues,
24332432To guard you
safe
from all en
suing danger.
24352434Ans. Stay, when i
st fit for me,
safe
st for you,
24382437Ans. Be't
so, there is a chappell
stands hard by,
24392438Vpon the We
st end of the Abbey wall,
24402439Thether conuay your
selues, and when the
sunne
24412440Hath turnd his back vpon this vpper world,
24422441Ile mary you, that done, no thnndring voice,
24432442Can breake the
sacred bond, yet Lady here you are mo
st safe.
24442443Infae. Father your lou's mo
st deere.
24452444Mat. I well
said locke vs into
some little roome by our
24462445selues that we may be mad for an houre or two.
24472446Hip. O good
Mathaeo no, lets make no noi
se.
24482447Mat. How! no noi
se! do you know where you are: sfoot
24492448amon
st all the mad-caps in
Millan:
so that to throw the hou
se
24502449out at window will be the better, & no man will
su
spe
ct that
24512450we lurke here to
steale mutton: the more
sober we are, the
24522451more
scuruy tis. And tho the Frier tell vs, that heere we are
24532452safe
st, i'me not of his minde, for if tho
se lay here that had lo
st 24542453there mony, none would euer looke after them, but heare are
24552454none but tho
se that haue lo
st their wits, o that if hue and cry
24562455be made, hether theile come, and my rea
son is, becau
se none
I 2 goes
THE HONEST WHORE.
24572456goes to be married till he be
starke mad.
24582457Hip. Mu
ffle your
selues yonders
Fluello.
Enter Fluello. 24602459Flu. O my Lord the
se cloakes are not for this raine, the
24612460tempe
st is too great: I come
sweating to tell you of it, that
24642463Flu. Whats the matter! you haue matterd it faire: the (Duk's at hand.
24672466Hip. Then all our plots
2467are turnd vpon our heads; and we
2468are blown vp
2468with our own vnderminings. Sfoot how comes
2469he,
2469what villaine dur
st betray our being here.
24702470Flu. Castruchio,
Castruchio tolde the Duke, and
Mathaeo 24722472Hip. Would you betray me to
Chastruchio,
24732473Ma. Sfoot he dambd him
selfe to the pit of hell if he
spake (ont agen.
24742474Hip. So did you
sweare to me,
so were you dambd.
24752475Mat. Pox on em, & there be no faith in men, if a man
shall
24762476not beleeue oathes
: he tooke bread and
salt by this light, that
24772477he would neuer open his lips.
Hip. Oh God, oh God.
24782478Ans. Sonne be not de
sperate
2479haue patience, you
shal trip your
2479enemy downe,
2480by his owne
slights, how far is the Duke hēce.
24802481Flu. Hees but new
set out
: Castruchio,
Pioratto and
Sinezi 24812482come along with him: you haue time enough yet to preuent
24832484Ans. You
shall
steale
secretly into the Chappell,
24842485And pre
sently be maried; if the duke
24852486Abide here
still,
spite of ten thou
sand eyes,
24862487You
shall
scape hence like Friers.
24872488Hip. O ble
st di
sgui
sde: O happy man.
24882489Ans. Talke not of happine
sse till your clo
sde hand,
24892490Haue her bith'forhead, like the lock of time,
24902491Bee not too
slow, nor ha
sty, now you clime,
24912492Vp to the towre of bli
sse, onely be wary
24922493And patient, thats all, if you like my plot
24932494Build and di
spatch, if not farewell, then not.
24942495Hip. O Yes, we doe applaud it, weele di
spute,
24952496No longer, but will hence and execute.
Fluello
THE HONEST WHORE.
24962497Fluello youle
stay here, let vs be gon,
24972498The ground that
fraighted louers tread vpon,
24992500Ans. Come then, away
: tis meete,
25002501To e
scape tho
se thornes, to put on winged feete.
Exeunt. 25012502Mat. No words I pray
Fluello, for it
stands vs vpon.
25022503Flu. Oh
sir, let that be your le
sson.
25032504Alas poore louers, on what hopes and feares,
25042505Men to
sse them
selues for women. when
shees got
25052506The be
st has in her that which plea
seth not.
25062507Enter to Fluello, the Duke, Castruchio, Pioratto and 25072508Sinezi from seuerall dores muffled. 25082509Duk. who
se there!
Cast. My Lord.
25092510Duk. Peace,
send that Lord away,
25102511A Lord
ship will
spoile all, lets be all fellowes.
2512Cast. Fluello, or els
Sinezi by his little legs.
25142514Duk. What! met vpon the very point of time,
25152515Is this the place.
Pio. This is the place my Lord.
25162516Duke. Dreame you on Lord
shps! come no more Lordes: (pray
25172517You haue not
seene the
se louers yet.
25192518Duk. Castruchio art thou
sure this wedding feate,
25212520Castr. So tis giuen out my Lord.
25222521Duk. Nay, nay, tis like, theeues mu
st ob
serue their houres,
25232522Louers watch minuts like A
stronomers,
25242523How
shall the
Interim houres by vs be
spent,
25252524Flu. Lets all goe
see the madmen.
25262525Omn. Mas content.
Enter Towne like a sweeper. 25272526Duk. Oh here comes one, que
stion him, que
stion him.
25282527Flu. How now hone
st fellow do
st thou belong to the hou
se.
25292528Tow. yes for
sooth, I am one of the implements; I
swepe the
25302529madmens roomes, and fetch
straw for em, and buy chaines
25312530to tie em, and rods to whip em, I was a mad wag my
selfe here
25322531once, but I thanke father
Anselm he la
sht me into my right (minde agen.
25332532Duk. Anselmo is the Frier mu
st marry them,
I 3 Cast.
THE HONEST WHORE.
25352534Cast. And where is father
Anselmo now?
25362535Tow. Mary hees gon but eene now.
25372536Duk. I, well done, tell me, whether is he gone?
25392538Flu. Ha, ha, this fellow is a foole, talkes idlelie.
25402539Pio. Sirra are all the mad folkes in
Millan brought hither
? 25412540Tow. How all, theres a wi
se que
stion indeede
: why if al the
25422541mad folkes in
Millan should come hither, there would not be
25442543Duk. Few gentlemen or Courtiers here, ha.
25452544Tow. Oh yes? abundance, aboundance, lands no
sooner fall
25462545into their hands, but
straight they runne out a their wits: Ci
- 25472546tizēs
sons & heires are
free of the hou
se by their fathers copy
: 25482547Farmers
sons come hither like gee
se (in
flocks) & when they
25492548ha
sould all their corne
fields, here they
sit & picke the
straws.
25502549Sin. Me thinks you
should haue women here a
swel as men.
25512550Tow. Oh, I: a plague on em, theres no ho with them, they are
25532552Flu. Are there no lawyers here among
st you?
25542553Tow. Oh no, not one: neuer any lawyer, we dare not let a
25552554lawyer come in, for heele make em mad fa
ster than we can
25572556Du. And how long i
st er'e you recouer any of the
se.
25582557Tow. Why according to the quantitie of the Moone thats
25592558got into em, an Aldermans
sonne will be mad a great while
25602559a very great while, e
specially if his
friends left him well, a
25612560whore will hardly come to her wits agen: a puritane ther's no
25622561hope of him, vnle
sse he may pull downe the
steeple and hang
25642563Flu. I perceiue all
sorts of
fish come to your net.
25652564Tow. Yes intruth, we haue blockes for all heads, we haue
25662565good
store of wilde oates here: for the Courtier is mad at
25672566the Cittizen, the Cittizen is madde at the Country men, the
25682567shoomaker is mad at the cobler, the cobler at the carman, the
25692568punke is mad that the Marchants wife is no whore, the Mar
- 25702569chants wife is mad that the puncke is
so common a whore
: 25712570gods
so, heres father
Anselmo. pray
say nothing that I tel tales
25732572Omn. God ble
sse you father.
Enter Anselmo. Ans.
THE HONEST WHORE.
25752574Cast. Pray may we
see
some of tho
se wretched Soules,
25762575That here are in your keeping?
Ans. Yes
: you
shall,
25772576But gentlemen I mu
st di
sarme you then,
25782577There are of mad men, as there are of tame,
25792578All humourd not alike
: we haue here
some,
25802579So api
sh and phanta
stike, play with a fether,
25812580And tho twould greeue a
soule, to
see Gods image,
25822581So blemi
sht and defac'd, yet do they a
ct 25832582Such anticke and
such pretty lunacies,
25842583That
spite of
sorrow they will make you
smile:
25852584Others agen we haue like hungry Lions,
25862585Fierce as wilde Buls, vntameable as
flies,
25872586And the
se haue oftentimes
from
strangers
sides
25882587Snatcht rapiers
suddenly, and done much harme,
25892588Whom if youle
see, you mu
st be weaponle
sse.
25912590Ans. Here: take the
se weapons in,
25922591Stand of a little pray,
so,
so, tis well:
25932592Ile
shew you here a man that was
sometimes,
25942593A very graue and wealthy Cittizen,
25952594Has
serud a prenti
ship to this misfortune,
25962595Bin here
seuen yeares, and dwelt in
Bergamo.
25972596Duke. How fell he
from his wits?
25992598Ile
stand a
side, que
stion him you alone,
26002599For if he
spy me, heele not
speake a word,
26012600Vnle
sse hees throughly vext.
Discouers an old man, wrapt in a Net. 2604Duk. God
speed father.
260526031. Mad. God
speed the plough: thou
shalt not
speed me.
26062604Pio. We
see you old man, for all you daunce in a net.
260726051. Mad. True, but thou wilt daunce in a halter, & I
shal not (
see thee.
26092607Cast. Are you a Fi
sherman father?
261026081. Mad. No, i'me neither
fish nor
fle
sh.
26112609Flu. What do you with that net then
? 261226101. Mad. Doe
st not
see foole! theres a
fre
sh Salmon in't: if
26132611you
step one foot furder, youle be ouer
shoes, for you
see ime
I 4 ouer
THE HONEST WHORE.
26142612ouer head & ear in the
salt-water: & if you fal into this whirl
- 26152613poole where I am, y'are drownd: y'are a drownd rat.--I am
26162614fishing here for
fiue
ships, but I cannot haue a good draught,
26172615for my net breakes
still, and breakes, but Ile breake
some of
26182616your necks & I catch you in my clutches. Stay,
stay,
stay,
stay,
26192617stay--wheres the wind, wheres the wind, wheres the winde:
26202618wheres the winde: out you guls, you goo
se-caps, you
26212619gudgeon eaters! do you looke for the wind in the heauens
? 26222620ha ha ha ha, no no, looke there, looke there, looke there, the
26232621winde is alwayes at that doore: hearke how it blowes, poo
ff 262526231. Mad. Do you laugh at Gods creatures? do you mock old
26262624age you roagues? is this gray beard and head counterfet, that
26272625you cry ha ha ha?--Sirra, art not thou my elde
st sonne
? 262926271. Mad. Then th'art a foole, for my elde
st sonne had a polt
26302628foote, crooked legs, a vergis face, & a peare-coullourd beard;
26312629I made him a
scholler, and he made him
selfe a foole.--Sirra!
26322630thou there? hould out thy hand.
Du. My hand, wel, here tis.
263326311. Mad. Looke, looke, looke, looke
: has he not long nailes,
26342632and
short haire?
Flu. Yes mon
strous
short haire, and abho
- 26352633minable long nailes.
1. Ma. Ten-peny nailes are they not?
263726351. Mad. Such nailes had my
second boy: kneele downe
26382636thou varlet, and aske thy father ble
ssing. Such nailes had my
26392637midlemo
st sonne and I made him a Promoter: & he
scrapt,
26402638&
scrapt, &
scrapt, till he got the diuell and all: but he
scrapt
26412639thus and thus, & thus, and it went vnder his legs, till at length
26422640a company of Kites taking him for carion,
swept vp all, all, all
26432641all, all, all, all.--If you loue your liues, looke to your
selues,
26442642see,
see,
see,
see, the Turkes gallies are
fighting with my
ships,
26452643Bownce goes the guns--oooh! cry the men
: romble romble
26462644goe the waters--Alas! there! tis
sunke--tis
sunck: I am vn
- 26472645don, I am vndon, you are the dambd Pirates haue vndone
26482646me,--you are bith Lord, you are, you are,
stop em, you are.
26492647Ans. Why how now Syrra, mu
st I fall to tame you?
265026481. Mad. Tame me? no: ile be madder than a roa
sted Cat:
26512649see,
see, I am burnt with gūpowder, the
se are our clo
se
fights.
26522650Ans. Ile whip you, if you grow vnruly thus.
1. Mad.
THE HONEST WHORE.
265326511. Mad. Whip me? out you toad:- whip me
? what iu
stice
26542652is this, to whip me becau
se Ime a begger?--Alas
? I am a
26552653poore man: a very poore man: I am
starud, and haue had no
26562654meate by this light, euer
since the great
floud, I am a poore
26572655man.
Ans. Well, well; be quiet and you
shall haue meate.
265826561. Mad. I, I, pray do, for looke you, here be my guts: the
se
26592657are my ribs,--you may looke through my ribs,--
see how my
26602658guts come out--the
se are my red guttes, my very guts, oh, oh!
26632661Cast. Father I
see you haue a bu
sie charge.
26642662Ans. They mu
st be v
sde like children, plea
sd with toyes,
26652663And anon whipt for their vnruline
sse:
26662664Ile
shew you now a paire quite di
fferent
26672665From him thats gon; he was all words: and the
se
26682666Vnle
sse you vrge em,
seldome
spend their
speech,
26692667But
saue their tongues-la you-this hithermo
st 26702668Fell
from the happy quietne
sse of mind,
26712669About a maiden that he loude, and dyed
: 26722670He followed her to church, being full of teares,
26732671And as her body went into the ground,
26742672He fell
starke mad. That is a maryed man,
26752673Was iealous of a faire, but (as
some
say)
26762674A very vertuous wife, and that
spoild him.
267726752. Mad. All the
se are whoremongers & lay with my wife:
26782676whore, whore, whore, whore, whore.
268026782. Mad. Ga
ffer
shoomaker, you puld on my wiues pumps,
26812679and then crept into her panto
fles: lye there, lye there,--this
26822680was her Tailer,-you cut out her loo
se-bodied gowne, and put
26832681in a yard more then I allowed her, lye there by the
shomaker:
26842682ô, mai
ster Do
ctor! are you here
: you gaue me a purgation,
26852683and then crept into my wiues chamber, to feele her pul
ses,
26862684and you
said, and
she
sayd, and her mayd
said, that they went
26872685pit a pat-pit a pat-pit a pat,-Do
ctor Ile put you anon into my
26882686wiues vrinall:-heigh, come a loft Iack
? this was her
school
- 26892687mai
ster, and taught her to play vpon the Virginals, and
still
26902688his Iacks leapt vp, vp: you prickt her out nothing but bawdy
K lessons,
THE HONEST WHORE.
26912689le
ssons, but Ile prick you all,-Fidler-Do
ctor-Tayler-Shoo
- 26922690maker,-Shoomaker-Fidler-Do
ctor-Tayler-
so! lye with my
26942692Castr. See how he notes the other now he feedes.
269826963. Mad. Ile not giue thee a bit,
269926972. Mad. Giue me that
flap-dragon.
270026983. Mad. Ile not giue thee a
spoonefull: thou lie
st, its no
27012699Dragon tis a Parrat, that I bought for my
sweete heart, and
270327012. Mad. Heres an Almond for Parrat.
270527032. Mad. Heres a roape for Parrat.
270627043. Mad. Eate it, for ile eate this.
270727052. Mad. Ile
shoote at thee and thow't giue me none.
270927072. Mad. Ile run a tilt at thee and thow't giue me none.
271027083. Mad. Wut thou? doe and thou dar'
st.
271227103. Mad. Ooh! I am
slaine-murder, murder, murder, I am
27132711slaine, my braines are beaten out.
27142712Ans. How now you villaines, bring me whips: ile whip you
271527133. Mad. I am dead, I am
slaine, ring out the bel, for I am dead,
27162714Duk. How will you do now
sirra? you ha kild him.
271727152. Mad. Ile an
swer't at Se
ssions: he was eating of Almond
27182716Butter, and I longd for't: the child had neuer bin deliuered
27192717out of my belly, if I had not kild him, Ile an
swer't at
se
ssions,
27202718so my wife may be burnt ith hand too.
27212719Ans. Take em in both: bury him, for hees dead.
272227203. Mad. I indeed, I am dead, put me I pray into a good pit (hole.
272327212. Mad. Ile an
swer't at Se
ssions.
Exeunt. 27252723Ans. How now hu
swife, whether gad you
? 27262724Bell. A nutting for
sooth: how doe you ga
ffer? how doe
27272725you ga
ffer? theres a French cur
sie for you too.
Pio.
THE HONEST WHORE.
27322730She came but in this day, talkes little idlely
27332731And therefore has the
freedome of the hou
se,
27342732Bell. Doe not you know me
? nor you? nor you, nor you?
27362734Bell. Then you are an A
sse, and you are an A
sse, and you
27382736Ans. Why, what are they
? come
: tell me, what are they?
27392737Bell. The're
fish-wiues: will you buy any gudgeons, gods
27402738santy yonder come Friers, I know them too, how doe you
27422740Enter Hipolito, Mathaeo, and Infaeliche disguisde 27442742Ans. Nay, nay, away, you mu
st not trouble Friers.
27452743The duke is here
speake nothing.
27462744Bell. Nay indeed you
shall not goe: weele run at barlibreak
27482746Mat. My puncke turnd mad whore, as all her fellowes are?
27492747Hip. Speake nothing, but
steale hence, when you
spie time.
27502748Ans. Ile locke you vp if y'are vnruly
fie
27512749Bell. fie! mary fo: they
shall not goe indeed till I ha tolde
27532751Duk. Good Father giue her leaue.
27542752Bell. I pray, good father, ad Ile giue you my ble
ssing.
27552753Ans. Wel then be briefe, but if you are thus vnruly,
27582756Bell. Let me
see 1.2.3. and 4. ile begin with the little Fri
- 27592757er
fir
st, heres a
fine hand indeed, I neuer
saw Frier haue
such
27602758a dainty hand
: heres a hand for a Lady, heres your fortune,
27612760You loue a Frier better then a Nun,
27622761Yet long youle loue no Frier, nor no Friers
sonne.
27632762Bow a little, the line of life is out, yet i'me a
fraid,
27642763For all your holy, youle not die a maide, God giue you ioy.
K 2 Bell.
THE HONEST WHORE.
27672766Bel. You loue one, and one loues you.
27682767You are a fal
se knaue, and
shees a Iew,
27692768Here is a Diall that fal
se euer goes.
27712770Bel. Troth
so does your no
se, nay lets
shake hands with you (too
: 27742773So he had need
: youle keepe good cheere,
27752774Heres a
free table, but a
frozen brea
st,
27762775For youle
starue tho
se that loue you be
st.
27772776Yet you haue good fortune, for if I am no lyar,
27782777Then you are no Frier, nor you, nor you no Frier
discouers (them 27802779Duk. Are holy habits cloakes for villanie?
27822781Hip. doe, draw all your weapons.
27832782Duk. Where are your weapons, draw.
27842783Omn. The Frier has guld vs of em.
27862785You ha learnt one mad point of Arithmaticke.
27872786Hip. Why
swels your
spleene
so hie? again
st what bo
some,
27882787Would you your weapons draw? hers! tis your daughters:
27922791Hip. You cannot
shed blould here, but tis your owne,
27932792To
spill your owne bloud were damnation,
27942793Lay
smooth that wrinckled brow, and I will throw
27962795Let it be rugged
still and
flinted o're,
27972796What can come forth but
sparkles, that will burne,
27982797Your
selfe and vs? Shees mine; my claymes mo
st good,
27992798Shees mine by marriage, tho
shees yours by bloud.
28002799I haue a hand deare Lord, deepe in this a
ct,
28012800For I fore
saw this
storme, yet willingly
28022801Put fourth to meete it? Oft haue I
seene a father
28032802Wa
shing the wounds of his deare
sonne in teares,
28042803A
sonne to cur
se the
sword that
strucke his father,
Both
THE HONEST WHORE.
28052804Both
slaine ith quarrell of your families,
28062805Tho
se
scars are now tane o
ff: And I be
seech you,
28072806To
seale our pardon, all was to this end
28082807To turne the ancient hates of your two hou
ses
28092808To
fre
sh greene
friend
ship, that your Loues might looke:
28102809Like the
springs forehead, comfortably
sweete,
28112810And your vext
soules in peacefull vnion meete,
28122811Their bloud will now be yours, yours will be theirs,
28132812And happine
sse
shall crowne your
siluer haires.
28142813Flu. You
see my Lord theres now no remedy.
28162815Duk. You be
seech faire, you haue me in place
fit
28172816To bridle me, ri
se Frier. you may be glad
28182817You can make madmen tame, and tame men mad,
28192818Since fate hath conquered, I mu
st re
st content,
28202819To
striue now would but ad new puni
shment:
28212820I yeeld vnto your happine
sse, be ble
st,
28222821Our families
shall henceforth breath in re
st.
28252824I throw vpon your ioyes my full con
sent.
28262825Bell. Am not I a good girle, for
finding the Frier in the wel?
2827gods
so you are a
2826braue man: will not you buy me
some Su
- 2828ger plums becau
se I am
so good a fortune teller.
28292828Duk. Would thou had
st wit thou pretty
soule to aske,
28312830Bell. Pretty
soule, a prety
soule is better than a prety body:
28322831do not you know my prety
soule? I know you
: 2836Is not your
28352837Bell. Baa, lamb! there you lie for I am mutton; looke
fine
2836man, he
2834was mad for me once, and I was mad for him once,
2837and he
2835was madde for her once, and were you neuer mad
? 2838yes I warrant,
2838I had a
fine iewell once, a very
fine iewell
2839and that naughty
2839man
stoale it away
from me, a very
fine
28422841Bell. Maide nay thats a lie, O twas a very rich iewell, calde
K 3 a mai-
THE HONEST WHORE.
28432842a Maidenhead, and had not you it leerer.
28452844Duk. Had he thy Maiden-head
? he
shall make thee a
- 28472846Bell. Shall he? ô braue Arthur of Bradly then
? 28482847Duk. And if he beare the minde of a Gentleman,
28502849Mat. I thinke I ri
fled her of
some
such paltry Iewell.
28512850Duk. Did you? then mary her, you
see the wrong
28522851Has led her
spirits into a lunacie.
28532852Mat. How, marry her my Lord? sfoot marry a mad-wo
- 28542853man: let a man get the tame
st wife he can come by,
sheele be
28552854mad enough afterward, doe what he can.
28562855Duk. Nay then, father
Anselmo here
shall do his be
st,
28572856To bring her to her wits, and will you then?
28582857Mat. I cannot tell, I may choo
se.
28592858Duk. Nay then law
shall compell: I tell you
sir,
28602859So much her hard fate moues me: you
should not breath
28612860Vnder this ayre, vnle
sse you marryed her.
28622861Mat. Well then, when her wits
stand in their right place, (ile mary her.
28632862Bell. I thanke your grace,
Mathaeo thou art mine,
28642863I am not mad, but put on this di
sgui
se,
28652864Onely for you my Lord, for you can tell
28662865Much wonder of me, but you are gon
: farewell.
28672866Mathaeo thou did
st fir
st turne my
soule black,
28682867Now make it white agen, I doe prote
st,
28692868Ime pure as
fire now, cha
ste as
Cynthias bre
st.
28702869Hip. I dur
st be
sworne
Mathaeo she's indeed.
28712870Mat. Cony-catcht, guld, mu
st I
saile in your
flie-boate,
28722871Becau
se I helpt to reare your maine-ma
st fir
st:
28732872Plague found you fort,-tis well.
28742873The Cuckolds
stampe goes currant in all Nations,
28752874Some men haue hornes giuen them at their creations,
28762875If I be one of tho
se, why
so: its better
28772876To take a common wench, and make her good,
28782877Than one that
simpers and at
fir
st, will
scar
se
28792878Be tempted forth ouer the thre
shold dore,
28802879Yet in one
sennight, zounds, turnes arrant whore,
Come
THE HONEST WHORE.
28812880Come wench, thou
shalt be mine, giue me thy gols,
28822881Weele talke of legges hereafter:
see my Lord,
2884Omn. God giue you ioy.
28852883Enter Candidoes wife and George. 28862884Geo. Come mi
stris we are in Bedlam now, mas and
see, we
28872885come in pudding-time, for heres the Duke.
28902888Cast. Its
Candido my Lord, he's here among the lunaticks
: 28912889father
Anselmo, pray fetch him forth: this mad woman is
28922890his wife, and tho
shee were not with child, yet did
she long
28932891mo
st spitefully to haue her husband mad, and becau
se
shee
28942893would be
sure, he
should turne Iew,
she placde him here in
28972896Duke. Come hither Signior--Are you mad.
2899Duke. Why I know that.
29002898Cand. Then may you know, I am not mad, that know
29012899You are not mad, and that you are the duke
: 29022900None is mad here but one--How do you wife:
29032901What do you long for now?--pardon my Lord,
29042904Shee had lo
st her childes no
se els: I did cut out
29052905Penniworths of Lawne, the Lawne was yet mine owne:
29062906A carpet was yet my gowne, yet twas mine owne,
29072907I wore my mans coate. yet the cloath mine owne,
29082908Had a crackt crowne. the crowne was yet mine owne,
29092909She
sayes for this Ime mad, were her words true,
29102910I
should be mad indeed -- ô fooli
sh skill,
29112911Is patience madne
sse? Ile be a mad-man
still.
29122912Wife. Forgiue me, and ile vex your
spirit no more.
29132913Duk. Come, come, weele haue you
friends, ioyne hearts, (ioyne hands.
29152915Nay ri
se, for ill-deeds kneele vnto none but heauen.
29162916Duk. Signior, me thinkes, patience has laid on you
29172917Such heauy waight, that you
should loath it.
K 4 Duke.
THE HONEST WHORE.
29192919Duk. For he who
se bre
st is tender bloud
so coole,
29202920That no wrongs heate it, is a patient foole,
29212921What comfort do you
finde in being
so calme.
29222922Cand. That which greene wounds receiue
frō
soueraigne (balme,
29232923Patience my Lord; why tis the
soule of peace:
29242924Of all the vertues tis neer
st kin to heauen.
29252925It makes men looke like Gods; the be
st of men
29262926That ere wore earth about him, was a
su
fferer,
29272927A
soft, meeke, patient, humble, tranquill
spirit,
29282928The
fir
st true Gentleman that euer breathd;
29292929The
stock of
Patience then cannot be poore,
29302930All it de
sires, it has; what Monarch more
? 29322932That can be, for it doth embrace all wrongs,
29332933And
so chaines vp, lawyers and womens tongues.
29342934Tis the perpetuall pri
soners liberty:
29352935His walkes and Orchards: 'tis the bond-
slaues
freedome,
29362936And makes him
seeme prowd of each yron chaine.
29372937As tho he wore it more for
state then paine:
29382938It is the beggers Mu
sick, and thus
sings,
29392939Although their bodies beg, their
soules are kings:
29402940O my dread liege! It is the
sap of bli
sse,
29412941Reares vs aloft; makes men and Angels ki
sse,
29422942And (la
st of all) to end a hou
should
strife,
29432943It is the hunny gain
st a wa
spi
sh wife.
29442944Duke. Thou giu'
st it liuely coulours: who dare
say
29452945he's mad, who
se words march in
so good aray?
29462946Twere
sinne all women
should
such husbands haue.
29472947For euery man mu
st then be his wiues
slaue.
29482948Come therefore you
shall teach our court to
shine,
29492949So calme a
spirit is worth a golden Mine,
29502950Wiues (with meeke husbands) that to vex them long,
29512951In Bedlam mu
st they dwell, els dwell they wrong.