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- Edition: An Humorous Day's Mirth
An Humorous Day's Mirth (Modern)
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1386.1[Scene 10]
[Knocking at door] Where be these puritans, these murderers? Let me 1390come in here.
Where is the strumpet?
Where is this harlot? Let us come in here.
What shall we do? The streets do wonder at us,
Come, Labesha, will you go?
No, no, I scorn to go. No king shall hear my plaint.
10.11And never more wear hat-band on my hat.
10.11.1[Exeunt.]
What dost thou mean? Thou must not hang on 1402me.
Oh, good Lord Moren, have me home with you.
Oh, my lord, be not so rude to leave her now.
Alas, man, an if my wife should see it, I were 1408undone.
10.16.1[Exeunt Moren and Martia.]
Pursue them, sirs, and taking Martia from him,
10.18.1[Exeunt the King and another.]
What villain was it that hath uttered this?
Why, 始twas even I. I thank you for your gentle 1415terms. You give me villain at the first. I wonder where始s 1416this old doter? What, doth he think we fear him?
Oh, monstrous man. What, wouldst thou have him 1418take us?
Would I, quoth you? Yea, by my troth would I. I know 1420he is but gone to call the constable or to raise the streets.
What means the man, trow? Is he mad?
No, no, I know what I do, I do it of purpose. I 1423long to see him come and rail at you, to call you harlot, 1424and to spurn you too. Oh, you始ll love me a great deal the 1425better. And yet, let him come, and if he touch but one thread 1426of you, I始ll make that thread his poison.
I know not what to say.
Speak, do you love me?
Yea, surely do I.
Why, then have not I reason that love you so dearly1431 as I do, to make you hateful in his sight that I might 1432more freely enjoy you.
Why, let us be gone, my kind Lemot, and not be 1434wondered at in the open streets.
I始ll go with you through fire, through death, through 1436hell.
10.31Come, give me your own hand, my own dear heart,
10.34Oh, let me sweetly kiss it.
Out on thee, wretch. He hath bit me to the bone.
Come, come, leave your passions, they cannot 1444move me. My father and my mother died both in a day, 1445and I rung me a peal for them, and they were no 1446sooner brought to the church and laid in their graves, but I 1447fetched me two or three fine capers aloft and took my leave 1448of them, as men do of their mistresses at the ending of a 1449galliard. Beso las manos.
Oh, brutish nature, how accurst was I ever to endure 1451the sound of this damned voice.
Well, an you do not like my humour, I can be but 1453sorry for it. I bit you for good will, an if you accept it, so; if 1454no, go.
Villain, thou didst it in contempt of me.
Well, an you take it so, so be it. Hark you, madam, 1457your wisest course is even to become Puritan again. Put 1458off this vain attire, and say, 鈥業 have despised all, thanks my 1459God. Good husband, I do love thee in the Lord始, and he 1460(good man) will think all this you have done was but to 1461show thou couldst govern the world, and hide thee as a 1462rainbow doth a storm. My dainty wench, go go. What, 1463shall the flattering words of a vain man make you forget 1464your duty to your husband? Away, repent, amend your life. 1465You have discredited your religion forever.
Well, wretch, for this foul shame thou puttest on 1467me, the curse of all affection light on thee.
10.43.1Exit.
Go, Habbakuk, go. Why, this is excellent. I shall shortly1469 become a schoolmaster, to whom men will put their 1470wives to practise. Well, now will I go set the Queen upon the 1471King, and tell her where he is close with his wench. And he 1472that mends my humour, take the spurs. Sit fast, for by 1473heaven, I始ll jerk the horse you ride on.
10.44.1[Exit.]