Peer Reviewed
- Edition: The Honest Whore, Part 1
The Honest Whore, Part 1 (Modern)
- Introduction
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- The Honest Whore, Parts 1 and 2: Acknowledgements
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- The Honest Whore, Parts 1 and 2: Abbreviations
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- The Honest Whore, Parts 1 and 2: Introduction
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- The Honest Whore, Parts 1 and 2: Analysis of the Plays
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- The Honest Whore, Parts 1 and 2: The Plays in Performance
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- The Honest Whore, Parts 1 and 2: Textual Introduction
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- The Honest Whore, Parts 1 and 2: Appendices
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- Texts of this edition
- Facsimiles
1960[4.3]
What始s o始clock now?
19632 Prentice
始Tis almost twelve.
1964Viola
That始s well.
19672 Prentice
Yes, forsooth, he始s furbished.
Now, as you ever hope to win my favour,
I warrant you, mistress, let us alone for keeping our 1976countenance; for if I list, there始s never a fool in all Milan shall 1977make me laugh, let him play the fool never so like an ass, 1978whether it be the fat court fool or the lean city fool.
Enough, then; call down George.
19802 Prentice
I hear him coming.
[To the Prentices] Be ready with your legs, then; let me see
I thank you, mistress. My back始s broad enough, now 1987my master始s gown始s on.
Sure, I should think it were the least of sin
始Twere a good comedy of errors, that, i始faith.
Whist, whist, my master!
You all know your tasks.
God始s my life, what始s that 1994he has got upon始s back? Who can tell?
[Aside] That can I, but I will not.
Girt about him like a madman. What? Has he lost 1997his cloak, too? This is the maddest fashion that e始er I saw. 1998What said he, George, when he passed by thee?
Troth, mistress, nothing: not so much as a bee, he did 2000not hum; not so much as a bawd, he did not hem; not so 2001much as a cuckold, he did not ha. Neither hum, hem, nor ha – 2002only stared me in the face, passed along, and made haste in, as if 2003my looks had worked with him to give him a stool.
Sure he始s vexed now; this trick has moved his spleen.
Nay, let me alone to play my master始s prize, as long as 2010my mistress warrants me. I始m sure I have his best clothes 2011on, and I scorn to give place to any that is inferior in 2012apparel to me. That始s an axiom, a principle, and is observed as much 2013as the fashion. Let that persuade you, then, that I始ll shoulder 2014with him for the upper hand in the shop, as long as this 2015chain will maintain it.
Spoke with the spirit of a master, though with the 2017tongue of a prentice.
Why, how now, madman? What, in your tricksy coats?
O peace, good mistress.
[To them] See what you lack! What is始t you buy? Pure calicoes, fine 2023hollands, choice cambrics, neat lawns. See what you 2024buy. Pray come near. My master will use you well; he can 2025afford you a pennyworth.
Ay, that he can – out of a whole piece of lawn, i始faith.
Pray see your choice here, gentlemen.
O fine fool! What, a madman? A patient madman? 2029Who ever heard of the like? Well, sir, I始ll fit you and your 2030humour presently. What, cross-points? I始ll untie 始em all in a trice. 2031I始ll vex you, faith! Boy, take your cloak; quick, come!
4.3.39.1Exit [with 1 Prentice].
4.3.39.2[George takes off his hat to Candido.]
Be covered, George. This chain and welted gown
Umh, umh, hum.
[Aside to Poh] That始s the shop, and there始s the fellow. [Indicating Candido in his prentice-coat.]
Ay, but the master is walking in there.
No matter; we始ll in.
始Sblood, dost long to lie in limbo?
An limbo be in hell, I care not.
[To them] Look you, gentlemen, your choice. Cambrics?
No, sir, some shirting.
You shall.
Have you none of this striped canvas for doublets?
None striped, sir; but plain.
I think there be one piece striped within.
Step, sirrah, and fetch it; hum, hum, hum.
4.3.54.1[Exit 2 Prentice, and returns presently with the piece.]
Look you, gentlemen, I始ll make but one 2048spreading. Here始s a piece of cloth, fine, yet shall wear like iron. 始Tis 2049without fault. Take this; upon my word, 始tis without fault.
Then 始tis better than you, sirrah.
Ay, and a number more. O, that each soul
2054Crambo
始Twould have some, then,
There was, indeed, a little flea-biting.
A gentleman had his pate broke. Call you that but 2058a flea-biting?
He had so.
Zounds, do you stand in始t? He strikes him.
始Sfoot, clubs, clubs! Prentices, down with 始em! Ah, you 2062rogues, strike a citizen in始s shop?
4.3.65.1[Enter several Prentices with clubs. They strike Crambo and Poh, and disarm them.]
None of you stir, I pray. Forbear, good George.
[To Candido] I beseech you, sir, we mistook our marks.
[To Candido] Your head bleeds, sir. Cry clubs.
I say you shall not. Pray be patient;
[To Crambo and Poh] Sirs, you始re best be gone.
We thank you, sir.
4.3.74.1Exeunt [Crambo and Poh].
2072Candido
[To George] You shall not follow them.
Yes, sir, we始ll use 始em like honest men.
Ay, well said, George, like honest men, though they be 2081arrant knaves, for that始s the phrase of the city. Help to lay up 2082these wares.
[Indicating Candido] Yonder he stands.
What, in a prentice-coat?
Ay, ay, mad, mad. Pray take heed.
[To George and the Prentices] How now? What news with them? What make they 2088with my wife? Officers? Is she attached? Look to your wares.
He talks to himself. O, he始s much gone indeed!
Pray pluck up a good heart; be not so fearful. [To his men] 2091Sirs, hark; we始ll gather to him by degrees.
Ay, ay, by degrees, I pray. O me! What makes he with 2093the lawn in his hand? He始ll tear all the ware in my shop.
Fear not; we始ll catch him on a sudden.
O you had need do so; pray take heed of your warrant.
I warrant, mistress. – Now, Signor Candido?
Now, sir, what news with you, sir?
‘What news with you?始 he says. O, he始s far gone!
[To her] I pray, fear nothing. Let始s alone with him. –
4.3.97Steal you o始t始 other side.
[To Candido] You始re changed, you始re altered.
Changed, sir? Why, true, sir. Is change strange? 始Tis not 2103the fashion unless it alter: monarchs turn to beggars, 2104beggars creep into the nests of princes, masters serve their 2105prentices, ladies their servingmen, men turn to women.
And women turn to men.
Ay, and women turn to men. You say true, ha, ha! A 2108mad world, a mad world.
4.3.100.1[Officers seize Candido]
Have we caught you, sir?
Caught me? [Laughing] Well, well, you have caught me.
[To 1 Officer] He laughs in your faces.
A rescue, prentices! My master始s catchpoled.
I charge you, keep the peace or have your legs 2114gartered with irons. We have from the Duke a warrant strong 2115enough for what we do.
[To George and the Prentices] I pray, rest quiet; I desire no rescue.
La, he desires no rescue. 始Las, poor heart,
2119Candido
[To 1 Officer] Well, what始s the matter?
[To his men as they bind Candido] Look to that arm;
2122Candido
Why, why?
Look how his head goes! Should he get but loose,
Fear not; we始ll make all sure, for our own safety.
Are you at leisure now? Well, what始s the matter?
Because you始re mad, put fear upon your wife.
O, ay, I went in danger of my life every minute.
What? Am I mad, say you, and I not know it?
That proves you mad, because you know it not.
Pray talk as little to him as you can:
2134Candido
Bound with strong cord!
But are you mad indeed, master?
My wife says so,
4.3.129Ha? Whither?
21421 Officer
Faith, e始en to the madmen始s pound.
O始God始s name! Still I feel my patience sound.
4.3.130.1Exeunt [Officers with Candido].
[To Prentices] Come, we始ll see whither he goes. If the master be 2145mad, we are his servants, and must follow his steps; we始ll 2146be madcaps too. – Farewell, mistress; you shall have us all in 2147Bedlam.
4.3.131.1Exeunt [George and Prentices].
I think I ha始 fitted now you and your clothes.
4.3.134.1Exit.