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  • Title: The Honest Whore, Part 1 (Quarto 2, 1604)
  • Editor: Joost Daalder
  • ISBN: 978-1-55058-490-5

    Copyright Digital Renaissance Editions. This text may be freely used for educational, non-profit purposes; for all other uses contact the Editor.
    Authors: Thomas Dekker, Thomas Middleton
    Editor: Joost Daalder
    Peer Reviewed

    The Honest Whore, Part 1 (Quarto 2, 1604)

    The converted Curtezan.
    spleene in an Angell, than rough humour in him: why ile give
    you in stance for it. This wonderfully temperd signior Candido
    vpon a time invited home to his house certaine Neapolitane
    lords of curious ta ste, and no meane pallats, conjuring his wife
    455of all loves, to prepare cheere fitting for such honourable tren-
    cher-men. She (ju st of a womans nature, covetous to try the
    vttermo st of vexation, and thinking at la st to get the starte of
    his humour,) willingly neglected the preparation, and became
    vnfurni sht, not onely of daintie, but of ordinarie di shes. He (ac-
    460cording to the mildene s s e of his brea st,) entertained the lords,
    and with courtly discourse beguiled the time (as much as a Cit-
    tizen might do:) To conclude, they were hungry lordes, for
    there came no meate in; their stomacks were plainely gulld,
    and their teeth deluded, and (if anger could have seizd a man,)
    465there was matter enough yfaith to vexe any Citizen in the
    world, if he were not too much made a foole by his wife.
    Flu: I, ile sweare for't: sfoote, had it beene my case, I should
    ha plaide mad trickes with my wife and family: fir st I would
    ha spitted the men, stewd the maides, and bak't the mi stre s s e,
    470and so served them in.
    Pio: Why t'would ha tempted any blood but his,
    And thou to vexe him? thou to anger him
    With some poore shallow je st ?
    Ca st : Sblood signior Pioratto, (you that disparage my con-
    475ceit,) ile wage a hundred duckats vppon the head on't, that it
    mooves him, frets him, and galles him.
    Pio: Done, tis a lay, ioyne golls on't: witnes signior Fluello.
    Ca st: Witnes, tis done:
    Come, follow me; the house is not farre off,
    480 Ile thru st him from his humour, vex his brea st,
    And win a hundred duckats by one je st. Exeunt.

    Enter Candidoes wife, George, and two prentices
    in the shoppe.

    Wife Come, you put vp your wares in good order heere, do
    485you not thinke you? one peece ca st this way, another that way,
    you had neede have a patient ma ster indeede.