482482Enter Candidoes wife, George, and two prentices 484484Wife Come, you put vp your wares in good order heere, do
485485you not thinke you, one peece ca
st this way, another that way?
486486you had neede have a patient mai
ster indeede.
George
The Honest Whore.
487487George I, ile be
sworne, for we have a cur
st mi
stris.
488488Wife You mumble, do you mumble? I would your mai
ster
489489or I could be a note more angry: for two patient folkes in a
490490hou
se
spoyle all the
servants that ever
shall come vnder them.
4914911. prentise You patient! I,
so is the divell when he is horne
493493Enter Castruchio, Fluello, and Pioratto. 494494All three Gentlemen, what do you lacke? what i
st you buy
? 495495See
fine hollands,
fine cambrickes,
fine lawnes.
496496George What i
st you lacke?
4974972. prentise What i
st you buy?
498498Cast. Wheres
signior
Candido thy mai
ster?
499499George Faith
signior, hees a little negotiated, hee'le appeare (pre
sently.
500500Cast. Fellow, lets
see a lawne, a choice one
sirra.
501501George The be
st in all
Millan, Gentlemen, and this is the
502502peece. I can
fit you Gentlemen with
fine callicoes too for dub
- 503503lets, the onely
sweete fa
shion now, mo
st delicate and courtlie, a
504504meeke gentle calico, cut vpon two double a
ffable ta
ffat
aes, ah,
505505mo
st neate, feate, and vnmatchable.
506506Flu. A notable-voluble tongde villaine.
507507Pio. I warrant this fellow was never begot without much
509509Cast. What, and is this
shee
sai
st thou?
510510George I, and the pure
st shee that ever you
fingerd
since
511you
511were a gentleman: looke how even
she is, look how cleane
512she
512is, ha, as even as the browe of
Cinthia, and as cleane as your
513sonnes
513and heires when they ha
spent all.
514514Cast. Puh, thou talk
st, pox on't tis rough.
515515George How? is
she rough
? but if you bid pox on't
sir, twill
516516take away the roughne
sse pre
sently.
517517Flu. Ha
signior; haz he
fitted your French cur
se?
518518GeorgeLooke you Gentleman, heeres an other, compare
519519them I pray,
compara Virgilium cum Homero, compare virgins
521521Cast. Puh, I ha
seene better, and as you terme them, evener
George
THE HONEST WHORE.
523523Geor. You may
see further for your mind, but tru
st me
524524you
shall not
find better for your body.
Enter Candido. 525525Cast. O here he comes, lets make as tho we pa
sse,
526526Come, come, weele try in
some other
shop.
527527Cand. How now? what's the matter?
528528Geor. The gentlemen
find fault with this lawne, fall out
529529with it, and without a cau
se too.
531531And that makes you to let 'em pa
sse away,
532532Ah, may I craue a word with you gentlemen?
534534Cast. Makes the better for the ie
st.
535535Cand. I pray come neare, - y'are very welcome gallants,
536536Pray pardon my mans rudene
sse, for
I feare me
537537Ha's talkt aboue a prentice with you, - Lawnes!
538538Looke you kind gentlemen - this! no: - I this:
539539Take this vpon my hone
st-dealing faith,
540540To be a true weaue, not too hard, nor
slack,
541541But eene as farre
from fal
shood, as
from black.
542542Cast. Well, how doe you rate it?
543543Cand. Very con
scionably, 18.s. a yard.
544544Cast. That's too deare
: how many yards does the whole
545545piece containe thinke you?
546546Cand. Why,
some 17. yardes
I thinke, or there abouts,
547547How much would
serue your turne? I pray.
548548Cast. Why let me
see - would it were better too.
549549Cand. Truth, tis the be
st in
Millan at fewe words.
550550Cast. Well: let me haue then - a whole penny-worth.
551551Cand. Ha, ha: y'are a merry gentleman.
554554Cast. Of lawne?
I of lawne, a pennorth,
sblood do
st not
555555heare? a whole pennorth, are you dea
ffe?
556556Cand. Dea
ffe? no Syr: but I mu
st tell you,
557557Our wares doe
seldome meete
such cu
stomers.
558558Cast. Nay, and you and your lawnes be
so
squemi
sh,
560560Cand. Pray
stay, a word, pray Signior: for what purpo
se
C Cast
THE HONEST WHORE.
562562Cast. Sblood, whats that to you:
Ile haue a penny worth.
563563Can. A penny-worth
! why you
shall:
Ile
serue you (pre
sently.
5645642. Pren. Sfoot, a penny-worth mi
stris!
565565Mist. A penny-worth! call you the
se Gentlemen?
566566Cast. No, no: not there.
567567Can. What then kinde
Gentle-man
? what at this corner (here?
568568Cast. No nor there neither.
569569Ile haue it iu
st in the middle, or els not.
570570Can. Iu
st in the middle
: - ha - you
shall too: what?
571571Haue you a
single penny>
? 572572Cast. Yes, heeres one.
Can. Lend it me
I pray.
573573Flu. An exlent followed ie
st.
574574Wife. What will he
spoile the Lawne now?
575575Can. Patience, good wife.
576576Wife. I, that patience makes a foole of you: Gentlemen,
577577you might ha found
some other Citizen to haue
578made a
578kind gull on, be
sides my husband.
579579Can. Pray Gentlemen take her to be a woman,
580580Do not regard her language. -- O kinde
soule:
581581Such words will driue away my cu
stomers,
582582Wife. Cu
stomers with a murrē: call you the
se cu
stomers?
583583Can. Patience, good wife.
Wife. Pax, a your patience.
584584Geor. Sfoot mi
stris, I warrant the
se are
some cheating
586586Can. Looke you Gentleman, theres your ware, I thank
587587you, I haue your mony; heare, pray know my
shop, pray
588let me haue your cu
stome.
590589Can. Let me take more of your money.
592591Pio. Harke in thine eare, tha
st lo
st an hundred duckets.
593592Cast. Well, well,
I knowt: i
st po
ssible that
Homo,
594593Should be nor man, nor woman: not once mooud;
595594No not at
such an iniurie, not at all!
596595Sure hees a pigeon, for he has no gall.
597596Flu. Come, come, y'are angry tho you
smother it:
598597Yare vext ifaith, - confe
sse.
Can. Why Gentle-men
599598Should you conceit me to be vext or moou'd?
He
THE HONEST WHORE.
600599He has my ware, I haue his money fort,
601600And thats no Argument I am angry
: no,
602601The be
st Logitian can not proue me
so.
603602Flu. oh, but the hatefull name of a pennyworth of lawne,
604603And then cut out, ith middle of the peece:
605604Pah, I gue
sse it by my
selfe, would moue a Lambe
606605Were he a Lynnen-draper - twould ifaith.
607606Can. Well, giue me leaue to an
swere you for that,
608607Were
set heere to plea
se all cu
stomers,
609608Their humours and their fancies: - o
ffend none:
610609We get by many, if we lee
se by one.
611610May be his minde
stood to no more then that,
612611A penworth
serues him, and mong
st trades tis (found,
613612Deny a pennorth, it may cro
sse a pound.
614613Oh, he that meanes to thriue with patient eye,
615614Mu
st plea
se the diuell, if he come to buy.
616615Flu. O wondrous man, patient boue wrong or woe,
617616How ble
st were men, if women could be
so.
618617Can. And to expre
sse how well my bre
st is plea
sd,
619618And
satis
fied in all: -
George fill a beaker.
Exit George. 620619Ile drinke vnto that Gentleman, who lately
621620Be
stowed his mony with me.
Wife. Gods my life,
622621We
shall haue all our gaines drunke out in beakers,
623622To make amends for pennyworths of lawne.
Enter Georg. 624623Can. Here wife, begin you to the Gentleman.
625624Wife. I begin to him.
Can. George,
filt vp againe:
626625Twas my fault, my hand
shooke.
Exit George. 627626Pio. How
strangely this doth
showe?
628627A patient man linkt with a wa
spi
sh shrowe.
629628Flu. A
siluer and gilt beaker! I haue a tricke
629to worke vp
- 630on that beaker,
sure twil
fret him,
630it cannot choo
se but vexe
631him.
Seig. C
astrachio,
631in pittie to thee,
I haue a cōceit,
632wil
saue
632thy 100. Duckets yet, twil doot,
633 & work him to impatience.
633634Cast. Sweet
Fluello, I
should be bountiful to that conceit.
634635Flu. Well tis enough.
Enter George. 635636Can. Here Gentleman to you,
636637I wi
sh your cu
stome, yare exceeding welcome.
637638Cast. I pledge you
Seig. C
andido, - heere you, that mu
st re
- 638639ceiue a 100. Duccats.
C 2
Pio.
THE HONEST WHORE.
639640Pior. Ile pledge them deepe yfaith
Castruchio,
641642Flu. Come: play't o
ff: to me,
643643Cand. George,
supply the cup.
644644Flu. So,
so, good hone
st George,
645645Here Signior Candido, all this to you.
646646Cand. Oh you mu
st pardon me,
I v
se it not.
647647Flu. Will you not pledge me then?
648648Cand. Yes, but not that:
649649Great loue is
showne in little.
650650Flu. Blurt on your
sentences, - Sfoot you
shall pledge
652652Cand. Indeed
I shall not.
653653Flu. Not pledge me? Sblood,
Ile cary away the beaker (
654then.
654655Cand. The beaker! Oh
! that at your plea
sure
sir.
655656Flu. Now by this drinke I will.
656657Cast. Pledge him, heele do't el
se.
657658Flu. So: I ha done you right, on my thumble naile,
658659What will you pledge me now?
659660Cand. You know me
syr,
I am not of that
sin.
661662Ile beare away the beaker by this light.
662663Cand. Thats as you plea
se, tis very good.
663664Flu. Nay it doth plea
se me, & as you
say, tis a very good (one:
664665Farewell Signior
Candido.
666667Cand. Y'are welcome gentlemen.
667668Cast. Heart not mou'd yet?
668669I thinke his patience is aboue our wit,
669670Geor. I told you before mi
stre
sse, they were all cheaters.
(Exeunt. 670671Wife Why foole, why husband, why madman, I hope
671672you will not let 'em
sneake away
so with a
siluer and gilt
672673beaker, the be
st in the hou
se too: goe fellowes make hue and
674675Cand. Pray let your tongue lye
still, all wil be well:
675676Come hither
George, hye to the Con
stable,
676677And in calme order wi
sh him to attach them,
Make
THE HONEST WHORE.
677678Make no great
stirre, becau
se they're gentlemen,
678679And a thing partly done in meriment.
679680Tis but a
size aboue a ie
st thou know
st,
680681Therefore pur
sue it mildly, goe be gone,
681682The Con
stabl's hard by, bring him along, - make ha
st a
-(gaine.
682683Wife. O y'are a goodly patient Woodcocke, are you not
684685See what your patiēce comes too: euery one
sadles you, and
685686rydes you, youle be
shortly the common
stone-hor
se of
686687Myllan: a womans well holp't vp with
such a meacocke, I
687688had rather haue a husband that would
swaddle me thrice a
688689day, then
such a one, that will be guld twice in halfe an how
- 689690er, Oh
I could burne all the wares in my
shop for anger.
690691Cand. Pray weare a peacefull temper, be my wife,
691692That is, be patient: for a wife and husband
692693Share but one
soule between them: this being knowne,
693694Why
should not one
soule then agree in one
? 694695Wife Hang your agreements: But if my beaker be gone.
(Exit. 695696Enter Castruchio, Fluello, Pioratto, and George. 696697Cand. Oh, heare they come.
697698Geor. The Con
stable
syr, let'em come along with me,
698699becau
se there
should be no wondring, he
staies at dore.
699700Cast. Con
stable goodman
Abram.
700701Flu. Now Signior Candido, Sblood why doe you attach (vs?
701702Cast. Sheart! attach vs
! 702703Cand. Nay
sweare not gallants,
703704Your oathes may moue your
soules, but not moue me,
704705You haue a
siluer beaker of my wiues.
705706Flu. You
say not true: tis gilt.
706707Cand. Then you
say true.
707708And being gilt, the guilt lyes more on you.
708709Cast. I hope y'are not angry
syr.
709710Cand. Then you hope right, for I am not angry.
710711Pio. No, but a little mou'de.
711712Cand. I mou'd! twas you were mou'd, you were brought (hither.
712713Cast. But you (out of your anger & impatience,)
713714Cau
s'd vs to be attacht.
714715Cand. Nay you mi
splace it.
C 3 Out
THE HONEST WHORE.
715716Out of my quiet
su
ffer
aence I did that,
716717And not of any wrath, had I
showne anger,
717718I should haue then pur
sude you with the lawe,
718719And hunted you to
shame, as many worldlings
719720Doe build their anger vpon feebler groundes,
720721The mores the pitty, many loo
se their liues
721722For
scarce
so much coyne as will hide their palme:
722723Which is mo
st cruell, tho
se haue vexed
spirits
723724That pur
sue liues, in this opinion re
st,
724725The lo
sse of Millions could not moue my bre
st.
725726Flu. Thou art a ble
st man, and with peace do
st deale,
726727Such a meeke
spirit can ble
sse a common weale.
727728Cand. Gentlemen, now tis vpon eating time,
728729Pray part not hence, but dyne with me today.
729730Cast. I neuer heard a carter yet
say nay
730731To
such a motion.
Ile not be the
fir
st.
733734Cand. The con
stable
shall beare you company,
734735George call him in, let the world
say what it can,
735736Nothing can driue me
from a patient man.
(Exeunt.